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http://www.gotthegeek.com/content/view/203/1/The weather is getting nicer, the days are growing longer, and the girls are dressing even more provocatively than before. This could only mean one thing - summer is just around the corner for us in the northern sections of the globe. With the start of summer also comes the end of spring semesters in colleges around North America marked with final exams which could leave some students with a bad taste in their mouths from their professors depending on how tough they were when it came to making the final exam.
For some professors, final exams are a way for them to say "Ha! I got you" to their students one last time since they are most likely abused by their spouse (Or cat if you're a philosophy professor I once had who was probably the biggest 40-year-old loser I have ever encountered), while for others they might make it a simple final that is fair and relates to material covered in class as well as in the assigned text book. Each professor has their own way of doing things in the classroom - Some good, some bad, and some simply horrible.
For those of you who have attended college, or those of you who are currently enrolled, you'll know exactly what I'm referring to: The college professor, and the different flavors of professor that are out there. From the zombie-like professor who should have retired 15 years ago, to the shock-jock wanna-be professor who insists on pushing the buck as far as they can. Each and every university has them, and they have the key to unlock your future into the real world (So-to-speak). Some people are very happy lying bricks their entire life. That's fine with me. Someone has to do it.
The adjunct who is in touch with reality:An adjunct is a professor who only teaches at a university part time. They may travel between two universities, some may teach a high school level class during the day and a college-level course at night, or some might have another full time job during the day and want to make some extra money by teaching at night. These guys know what it's like to be hard pressed for time. Most of them do, anyway.
With the cost of text books and tuition rising almost every year, along with rising gas prices, most college students have a hard enough time finding money just to finance their college education. The only way to get enough money to attend college and still be able to feed yourself in the process is to work - sometimes full time, others have to work more than 40 hours a week. I have even heard of several young women who have had to offer sexual favors in order to pay their way through college.
Working students don't want to have to put up with an instructor who thinks that their class is the only class that their students are taking. Most of the time adjuncts are the best when it comes to assigning realistic amounts of work for today's students along with exams that are relative to the material that was covered in class.
The department head who is out of touch with reality:If you happen to get the department head as a professor, be prepared to get a nearly impossible course schedule filled with 10 chapters of reading in between classes, only two exams during the entire semester that each cover half of the material that may (or may not have) covered, one term paper discussing some obscure topic that was never even mentioned in the text book or class lectures. The department head expects their students to go home and study nothing but the subject that they are teaching. They do not believe in taking more than one class at the same time, and they also think that their subject is far more superior and useful than any other - even though the professor teaching in the neighboring classroom can be heard making the exact same claim.
Retired, then brought back from retirement professor who should have remained retired:Depending on where you attended college, some of you may have had an instructor like this at one point during your college career.
Some guys just don't know when to give up. Here's a tip: When you can no longer hear your wife yelling at you to turn up Wheel of Fortune who is sitting three feet from you, you probably should no longer be teaching - just concentrate on staying alive - that might be hard enough. Even if the university begs you to come back because they are short on instructors, do us all a favor and tell them you can't do it because it conflicts with your bingo schedule.
Most of the professors that teach much longer than they should be teaching are usually clueless to what's going on and tend to teach next to nothing because they get side tracked very easily. These same professors then insist on handing out an exam even if the material hasn't been explained. Their defense: "Well, it's in the text book".
No need to worry, though. More than likely the exam that they are going to be handing out on the final day of glass has probably already made its way out onto the internet - it's had since about 1984 since that was the last time he bothered to break out the type writer and make up a new exam.
Don Imus wanna-be who just got tenured:I'm fairly certain that there is one of these in every university in the United States. You know, the professors who push the First Amendment to its limits by saying things like, "all gays could go to hell, that's fine by me!" or "do people with Alzheimer's just forget to kill themselves?" These professors, whom you could call "shock professors", probably recently got tenured and want to start some controversy since the chances of them getting fired are slim to none. Unless of course they were to have sex with an under-aged student, but at the college level that is next to impossible.
Complaining to the department head or the dean of students about the shock professor most likely won't do much good. Your only line of defense is to come up with a quick and witty reply that will let the professor know that what they have said was out of line and uncalled for. If that doesn't work, play a nice long game of Doom in your dorm room or where ever you happen to reside while attending college.
Honest Joe who is just trying to make an honest living:These are fairly hard to come by these days. Our writing staff here at The Geekery has unanimously come to the conclusion that a good portion of the professors teaching these days put their own spin on whatever it is that they are teaching. For instance, an accounting professor may decide to use a different type of table other than a T-table to log transactions, even though the assigned text book for the course only uses T-tables.
The Honest Joe on the other hand goes by the book and syllabus that was giving out during the first day of class. The Honest Joe will try their hardest to go by the book and stick to the course schedule that was attached to the syllabus. If any changes are made to the syllabus, he or she will let you know exactly what is changing, and mention it for several classes to make sure everyone is aware of the changes. The Honest Joe is teaching because they like teaching, and they want to see their students given a fair chance while in college instead of being fed to the wolves like in other classes.
