Topic: "The Meaning of Leaf" Article (Read 3295 times)

LuciferSam · « **on:** October 11, 2006, 08:45:43 AM »

Posted to main page, apparently some things have been changed while I procrastinated... so I'm waiting for it to be "reviewed"? Anywhoo, it should be up shortly, and if it doesn't appear... here it is:

The Meaning of Leaf
From the journals of Lucille Satan Elizabeth Samuel
Part Two in a semi ongoing sortofseries

In which your (hopefully) favourite forum vagrant explores the intellectual,pseudo intellectual, and simply psuedo geeks of the world, in particular those who ingest into themselves the smoke of a lush leafy plant from the south of the americas; properly and excessively proselytizing his point.

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In the effort and support of the revolutionary idea of media synergy, Luci recommends that you procure and listen to the following songs while reading and pondering this article:

Dean Martin - Come Back to Sorrento
Dean Martin - Memories are Made of This
Dean Martin - I Love Paris
Dean Martin - Come Back to Sorrento (reprised!)
Dean Martin - Blue Moon
Dean Martin - That's Amore
Dean Martin - Arriverderci Roma
Bobby Vinton - Blue Velvet
Frank Sinatra - Witchcraft
Frank Sinatra - The Best is Yet to Come
Frank Sinatra - Young at Heart
Charmillionaire - Riding Dirty (seriously.)
John Coltrane - Lush Life (To purify you from last track)

In further tactile synergy interests, Luci recommends that you smoke any cigar you might have at hand. Indeed, he recommends you eat a nice steak with a side ceaser salad, pour a glass of Chianti, and find a CAO Italia "Fato" for this occasion. This of course is optional. Veal will work in place of steak.

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In our last segment, I conducted a stream of consciousness attempt to decode the psyche of the tobacco professional, aruguably the most geeky of tobacco geeks. Needless to say, it failed in a miserable fashion, and I couldn't help but think I understood them *less* with my further follow up digging. As such, undeterred by defeat, I decided to join forces with this dark alliance - I have since forayed into their very realm by becoming such a monster, in a minor way. I will, in this article, explore this avenue breifly, and then proceed to examine traditional computer geeks who enjoy smoking - a group that esteemed disappearing artist Ivan Davidoff terms the "Man of Letters geeks".

In late February of this year, I entered into a shady business pact with another tobacconist and friend in the general west coast area. His tobacco shop has a rather large upper area that he really had no use for beyond his store security camera stuff and some office supplies, and so he and I put our senior citizen cahoots together and started, shall we say, an extensive remodel. By march, we had our own speakeasy, if you will. I had tired of not being able to smoke in most of the area coffee shops, and wanted a place that he, I, and a few choice friends could sit back and have espresso, beer, wine, scotch, light foods, and smoke to our hearts content, maybe play a bit of poker Free of tax. So, we made our dream a reality and I leaped in to the small business arena with vigor: a full bar, about 48 regular customers, a full kitchen with panini press (vital), all manner of coffees and teas, and a modest counter of cigars that may or may not make the excise man shake a finger.

After I had figured out the whole wireless thing, and figured out how to work a cash register, I was set! There were of course the normal business foibles - keeping everything in the black, maintaining customer service, assuring protection for my little racket, etc.

The procurement, needless to say, was one of the more enjoyable points. I started out with about 20 guys who I wanted as regulars, and polled them all on their favourite cigars, pipe tobaccos, and fine cigarettes. I assembled a list of domestic cigars: CAOs, Padrons, punch, H Upmanns, Cuestra Rays... all the finer things. A resounding choice in the cigarette field was Nat Sherman Naturals, Camel Wides, and Djarum Super and Black clove cigarettes. Popular selections from the Island South of Miami included the ever enduring Cohiba, Bolivar, Partagas, Diplomaticos, and Juan Lopes. The pipe tobaccos were many and varied, and more often than not I had to hunt for flavors or blend my own to get their satisfaction the perfection. In the end, I decided to keep in stock 3 boxes (20-25 per is the box average) of about 130 different cigars, 40 pounds of pipe tobaccos, and 5 different cigarette brands (Camel Wides, Lucky Strike Unfiltered, Nat Sherman Touch of Cloves, Havana Ovals, New York Cuts, and Classics, Djarum Supers {blacks were just *too* youthful for me to tolerate. Damned kids and their black cigarettes. Looking all young...}, and the Dunhill line). I try to throw in a good broad selection of sample packs of cigars, and cigarello boxes as well.

I've had a great time of it, 4 days a week when I'm in the area I get to play shopkeeper, bartender, and dirty old man all rolled into one. As such, it didn't take long to figure out the mystery behind the tobacco geek - it's about socializing. Sure, tobacco is a drug. It's addictive! But, there is something more addictive about the whole experience: sitting down, taking life a little slower than what we're accustomed to in this day and age, and chatting it up while enjoying a simple and for all the bloviated health warnings, relatively harmless pleasure. For one thing, you can't complain about second hand smoke when literally *everyone* is lit up!

In the context of such blatant laziness, you can't help but conjecture that surely there exist particular tech geeks who also inhabit the realm of the tobacco geek. These are the geeks who don't simply sit in a dark room or brightly lit cubicle typing away while sipping coffee and redbull, simultaneously (though they may do that as well). No, these are those rare and treasured men and women who sit back in their decidedly comfortable chairs, if they have any say in the matter, think in a slow and concise manner, perhaps have some Thelonious Monk playing behind them, and can somehow smoke a pipe without even having touched such a thing all their lives. They carry this relaxed aura with them in all their patient, collected actions. If they are at home, they may indeed light up a pipeful of tobacco and slowly work away at their specialty; at work, they may count the hours until they can take a slow puff of a favored cigar.

The man of letters geek, that sort of fellow who may be found humming "If I Were a Carpenter" instead of the latest techno beat, can be found even among us here at the Geekery. Noted scholar and man of dubious gentleness Ivan Davidoff had more than a few enlightnening things to say on the issue", and we will be exploring these and other musings when I point my canards towards the subject in the next segment.

For now,
Luci Out"*

*The posted version is different, as both were added after being Copied over and Pasted. I hadn't expounded that point yet, forgot about the ending, which is pretty minor... wink
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Discuss?

I have some fun stats for this article.

Damages-

Chronological: It took me about 9 hours to compile, write, edit, but the research and writing process stretched out over 4 months.

Fiscal: $440.00 USD (Tax Deductable!) for 2 boxes of cigars, 3 ounces of pipe tobacco, and of bottle of Blackbush whiskey, and some of the entries to the Eadible entry.

Smoked: (Only counting cigars, pipes, or misc smoked WHILE directly researching or writing article): 17 Bowls of Peterson University Flake in an One-Hundred-and-Fortieth Anniversary Pipe, 5 bowls of Peterson luxury blend in a Cassano Perla pipe. 12 H. Upmann Coronas, and 9 Punch Rare Corojos. 1 pack of Nat Sherman Touch-of-Cloves, 2 packs Nat Sherman New York Cut.

Eadible/Otherwise ingested: 3 Cajun steaks, 12 massive heartkilling orders of hashed-browns "with your choice of egg, your choice of bacon or sausages, and endless coffeepot" (for 3.50! A little of what America used to be.) , 1 bottle of irish whiskey, 3 glasses of various scotch (Laphroig, Bowmore, and Talisker), 4 bottles of wine (various), 1 half bottle of port (Fonseca), A La Cucina Trapanese style meal cooked by my token mafia friend in New York {featured in my next article} that consisted of, among many things, arancini di riso con ricotta, deep fried tomatoes, and a marinated tuna steak. Around 4 million liters of coffee. (estimated... cheesy)

Concert tickets: 2, $10.00 to an open mike jazz-and-blues gig.

Petrol: Most likely around 80 bucks.

Motorcycle Repair: $13.00 for two spark plugs stolen by some crackfiend off of my Yamaha while I was inside a cigar store.

Socrates · « **Reply #1 on:** October 11, 2006, 09:41:52 AM »

Well done, I'd like to visit if ever in your neck of the woods.

As for cigars I'd recommend Royal Barbados, cuban filler with costa rican wrappers I believe. Very smooth smokes and perfectly legal to bring into the US. Or at least I brought a case back with me each time I've been through Barbados without problems. My preference is for the smaller sizes, I prefer a 30 minute or so smoke. They go wonderfully with a fine port after that steak.

Plus if you're ever in Bridgetown you can visit the "factory" where the 8-10 ladies make the cigars. The company is Caribbean Cigar Company if you're up to some googling

LuciferSam · « **Reply #2 on:** October 11, 2006, 10:10:34 AM »

In all my life, I have never been to Barbados! I may have to give them a try, and perhaps get down there. Closest I've been, on reflection, is most likely Cuba itself. I've been to three of the Festival del Habano events, via my connection to some of the more prominant cuban jazz artists. I was there, in the most recent festival in march, at the behest of some expatriots of Buena Vista Social Club fame, (For any fan of latin jazz, pardon my shameless namedropping

) and even got to meet Fidel at an earlier event.

On this end, I can clear you entrance if we're not raided ruby ridge style any time soon. I feel *fairly* safe, we have one SPD officer as a regular, but I won't feel totally safe until I can get in with a Washington Dept. of Liquor Control officer. Better yet, a congressman. It would get them away from our pages. I will also trade recommendations and suggest that if you like to set off that steak-and-port heavy taste with a smoother cigar, (and you enjoy that ISOM risk and flavor) you may want to try a Cohiba Siglo II. About an 8 Euro stick, box runs in the low 200s. As always, I can provide honest joes with certain sources to procure said certain cigars, via PM.

Big Orange Cat · « **Reply #3 on:** October 11, 2006, 05:47:39 PM »

Your business endeavor intrigues me. In fact, I think it would intrigue my husband, who is a tobacco aficionado as well as a enjoyer of fine whiskies. You're in Seattle, aren't you?

LuciferSam · « **Reply #4 on:** October 11, 2006, 09:19:51 PM »

About 4-5 months of the year, yes. Which is more than I am anywhere else.

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Author Topic: "The Meaning of Leaf" Article (Read 3295 times)

LuciferSam

"The Meaning of Leaf" Article

Socrates

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LuciferSam

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Big Orange Cat

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LuciferSam

Re: "The Meaning of Leaf" Article