Topic: Dr Judge (Read 10595 times)

Anonymous · « **on:** October 20, 2004, 12:13:35 PM »

http://www.gotthegeek.com/the_judge/images/DrJudge3.jpg">

Welcome folks! Mah name is Dr Judge and I have got a great show fer yous all today! I’m gunna have two guests on the show and they will be sharin’ with us their personal experiences as virtual friends. That’s right folks! These gaaz have never met face ta face, yet them folks have been sharin’ secrets on the INT URRR NET fer years. Behind the back of their wives…

Let me first give a warm welcome to Reimero. Come on over here pardner! Have a seat!

*Audience claps*

http://www.gotthegeek.com/the_judge/images/DrJudge1.jpg">

DR J: Welcome Reimero. First, Let’s tell our viewers a little about this friendship between the two of yous’ all. Now, fer the record, we’ve already established this isn’t a gay relationship. It has nothin’ to do with being gay. Ah just wanna throw that out to the audience right off the bat. I wanna make sure there’s no misinterpretation about what this show is all about today. So tell us about the two of you Reimero. Where didja all meet? How long have you know each other and so on.

Reimero: Well… We’ve known each other for about 3 or 4 years. It’s not like were best friends or anything, but we’re good friends in the sense that we are able to share a lot with each other. We’ve met on a discussion board relating to Role playing games. Hack Master to be more precise. And we also share similar interests and views in terms of politics and in terms of being tech savy.

DR J: Alright… So yous all been playin them devil games and then yous all met and things happened from that point. Alright, well that gives us a pretty darn good idea of how your friendship got all started out. Now Reimero, ah have a surprise for you… I’m gunna introduce yous’ all ta each other! Demosthenes, come on out here!

*Reimero’s jaw drops and the audience claps like a bunch of maniacs*

http://www.gotthegeek.com/the_judge/images/DrJudge2.jpg">

DR J: Have a seat right next ta Reimero there. You boys can shake hands! Come on now. Don’t be shy. Mah momma taught me somethin’ about shyness. She said “I’m gunna be in yer face 24/7 until you get yer shit straight”. Man, she scared the pants off me that day! OK now boys, tell me how e-friendship is different than real life friendship. Why don’t you start Demosthenes.

Demo: Sure. It's lower maintenance, for one. It's pretty casual... you know, because you can shoot the shit with someone one day, and not on another, and it's no big deal. With friends in the 3D universe, if you don't call them or see them once in a while, you start to lose them as real life interferes with things. You don't get that kind of pressure with e-friendships.

Reimero: That's a tough one. I think online we have an alternate persona that's not entirely who we are in real life. That's not to say we misrepresent ourselves, but it's a lot easier to put our best sides forward. That said, as online friendships go on, the "real you" definitely tends to emerge. Still, there's a certain lack of spontanaity, and it makes going out for a beer a little bit harder.

Dr J: Waitaminute… Are you guys serious??? You’re just pullin’ mah leg here right? Or is that pullin’ mah arm… Ah ferget.

Demosthene, YOU NEED TO GET OUT there and commit to real people! Sure, it’s not always easy. There’s conflict, but you just can’t shut people off and hide behin’ a computer screen thingy and pretend that life is great! And you Remeiro, YOU NEED TO STOP PRETENDIN’ to be someone you’re not and live life as yer true self. Yous gotta face your demons! There’s an ol’ saying where ah come from an it goes like this : “Sometimes you make the right decision, sometimes you make the decision right”. You mah friends, are not equipped to make such decisions. But we’re gunna change that Right here on Dr Judge!

Alright… Let’s figure out what else is screwed up in yer lives. I want you to tell me negatives about each other. There’s ups and downs in real life friendships. IT”S NORMAL!!! Ah assume the same would apply to e-friendship. Describe some downs yous all had to deal with. Tell me what you don’t like about each other. It’s time to get real! Don’t worry, I got tissues is you need’em.

Reimero: Demosthene is a smart guy and he doesn’t back down readily when he’s wrong. Mostly, it’s because he feels he’s right all the time. But I’m like that too. And sometimes, the easiest way out of an argument is to reach for the power bar. But it’s a good thing because it can lead to rather stark disagreements. Seriously, though, he's intelligent, humorous, well-read and has just the right diabolical touch behind the GM shield.

Dr J: GM? He drives an import! I’m not his friend and even I know that! Alright, what about you Demosthenes?

Demosthenes: We've had a heated discussion or two on some touchy subjects for him; I actually enjoy that though. And he does to. He's quick-witted and teh funay. He also tends to understand what I'm getting at without me having to over-explain things on some subjects. He's easy to communicate with. Reimero could have an extremely annoying habit that makes him impossible to be around in person, but since I only know him online, I wouldn't ever even be aware of it. Personality-wise, at least online, there isn't anything I don't like about him. He's a pretty c00l d00d.

Dr J: First of, YOUS BOTH NEED TA LEARN HOW TA LISTEN! I’m asking about conflict. This is what this show is about. I can’t work with yous if yous all say yous like each other! There’s gotta be issues somewhere. Work with me here! A friendship with no issue is like a burrito with no sauce. It’s crap!

Alright… tell me more about the growth of your relationship. How does a relationship grow on the INT URRR NET? I mean, you’re over there typing “hey!” and the other one’s like typin’ “Hey” back ta yous. Ah just don’t get it. Don’t yer fingers hurt?

Reimero: Erm.. No. My fingers don’t hurt. You see Dr. Judge, in order to start an e-friendship, you need to meet with someone compatible. For example, in an AOL chat room or something, you could have two individuals who start trolling with A/S/L? Then they start hitting on every ch1xx0r. And then you end up with two delusional old perverts who pretend to be hot lesbians and they bond. There’s just so many different ways to hook up. And then, just like a real relationship, you make it grow by investing time and effort into it. You can meet at regular spots and even introduce or be introduced to other friends. You can schedule meeting times and places. The possibilities are endless, but the process is essentially the same as real life friendship.

Demosthenes: Yeah! Remeiro and I don’t actually make schedules, we just frequently bump into each other and take it from there. I think we have enough in common (interests-wise) that we could probably get along well in the real world. I'd love to be a player at his HackMaster table, and I think he'd be a great addition to my own crew, given his love of the game and a similar outlook on the subject. I think our overlapping tastes in music and instruments would be something to go on as well. As he was saying, there’s even opportunities to introduce people to one another. I mean, I invited him to teh Geekery (OMFGLOL) originally because I thought he'd get our particular sense of geek-related humor there, so it's not quite as "random" as that, but it's not like we make an appointment on a regular basis to be online at the same time. It just works out that way because we both have idle time in our daily work lives more often than not.

Dr J: Woah! Now that’s what I was lookin’ for! Listen boys, I’m gunna be real upfront with yous all and yer gunna hate mah guts for sayin’ this, but awarness witout action is worthless. Do you see where I’m going with this? Life is a marathon, it's not a sprint. But if yer just standing there behind a computer, avoiding your real life problems, then get up each morning, look at yourself in the mirror, and see yourself not as someone who is unable to deal with the real world, but as the someone you will become.

Demosthenes, let’s be honest here. YOU DON’T HAVE TA HIDE behind a computer. That’s what ye’re doing. No! Don’t shake your head. That’s what ye’re doing and you need ta be told it. YOU NEED TA ACKNOWLEDGE that you have a confidence problem. And then ah can help you deal with it. Sometimes you just got to give yerself what you wish someone else would give ya. Take a look at me.

http://www.gotthegeek.com/the_judge/images/DrJudge5.jpg">

Here’s a picture of me hanging out with real people. And not just any people. Celebrities with fake boobs! It doesn’t get any better than that! You can have that too Demosthenes! That’s what we’re gunna be workin’ on during the next few weeks. And when I’m done with you, you’ll be surrounded by giant silicone lemons. Erm.. I mean melons.

Remeiro, when you were introduced to Demosthenes earlier in the show, you did something very wrong. YOU DON’T NEED TO STUFF YOUR FACE with creamy treats. Demosthenes was happy to see you and you barely acknowledged him because you were too busy eating your little cakes! And you call yourself a friend? YOU NEED to support Demosthenes with his social anxieties. This is da real life and you can’t just reach fer yer power bar when ye’re ON MAH SHOW! As fer your issues, well obviously, you’re ashamed of who you are. I’m gunna work with you! I’m gunna change all that negativity but I’ll need you ta work with me. Sometimes you just got to give yourself what you wish someone else would give you. Did ah use that line today? Ah think ah did…
All I can tell you boys is that failure is no accident. Yer gonna learn ta get real. And yer gonna do it on mah show! See you next week folks! And don’t ferget… Buy mah books!

http://www.gotthegeek.com/the_judge/images/DrJudge4.jpg">

Demosthenes · « **Reply #1 on:** October 20, 2004, 12:31:48 PM »

reimero · « **Reply #2 on:** October 20, 2004, 12:33:25 PM »

Anonymous · « **Reply #3 on:** October 20, 2004, 12:34:45 PM »

Demosthenes · « **Reply #4 on:** October 20, 2004, 12:38:41 PM »

reimero · « **Reply #5 on:** October 20, 2004, 12:41:17 PM »

Demosthenes · « **Reply #6 on:** October 20, 2004, 12:43:23 PM »

GIS result for "hurr":

hackess · « **Reply #7 on:** October 20, 2004, 12:43:26 PM »

What the...

Anonymous · « **Reply #8 on:** October 20, 2004, 12:44:11 PM »

I'd be interested in getting a discussion on e-friendship started. How it compares to real life freindships, how it's in fact part of our real life sometimes, etc.

These are some of the questions I asked Demosthenes and Remeiro to answer. Of course, there was some editing of their answers done in the main article for the sake of comedy but feel free to give your two cents on any of these even if they were intented for Demo and Remeiro.

Describe how e-friendship is different than real life friendship.

With any friendship, there is sometimes ups and downs. Name an event or behavior exhibited by Demosthenes that you didn't really care for.

What is the thing you like most about your e-friends?

What do you like least about them?

With e-frienship, you interact in cyberspace. But how far does that friendship grow? As far as a real life friendship could grow? Are there limitations?

How do you hook up in cyber space? Do you just hang around the same spots and randomly find yourselves at a location at the same time?

Do you sometimes make plans to meet at a specific spot and a specific time?

Is your e-friend part of your real life entourage? I mean, is anyone from your family, your real life friends, your spouse, your cooworkers or anyone else aware of his existence and of the unique friendship you share? How do they feel about it?

Anonymous · « **Reply #9 on:** October 20, 2004, 12:47:52 PM »

Quote from: catwritr

What the...

LOL! Combine this statement with the last stament you made in the last thread of this nature and you get a complete statement. Well.. You'd duplicate "the" but what ever.

Do you guys enjoy this format anyway? I'm just trying to get discussions going but I try to be original in the way I bring them to the table. I'd love to get feedback on the concept.

pbsaurus · « **Reply #10 on:** October 20, 2004, 01:46:49 PM »

Bravo! That was brilliant! Thanks for brightening my day Dr. Judge

As for your inquiry into e-friendships, they rule. I've met several of my e friends and definitely wasn't disappointed in meatspace.

Demosthenes · « **Reply #11 on:** October 20, 2004, 01:59:48 PM »

I thought it was pretty funny.

ivan · « **Reply #12 on:** October 20, 2004, 02:27:04 PM »

Quote from: TheJudge

I'd be interested in getting a discussion on e-friendship started. How it compares to real life freindships, how it's in fact part of our real life sometimes, etc.

These are some of the questions I asked Demosthenes and Remeiro to answer. Of course, there was some editing of their answers done in the main article for the sake of comedy but feel free to give your two cents on any of these even if they were intented for Demo and Remeiro.

Describe how e-friendship is different than real life friendship.

It's much, much, much safer. In every respect. Safer.

Quote

With any friendship, there is sometimes ups and downs. Name an event or behavior exhibited by Demosthenes that you didn't really care for.

He fucking left HN.

Quote

What is the thing you like most about your e-friends?

They are smart and funny.

Quote

What do you like least about them?

They don't pay enough attention to me. They live their lives as though other things besides what I post matter to them.

Quote

With e-frienship, you interact in cyberspace. But how far does that friendship grow? As far as a real life friendship could grow? Are there limitations?

No limitations. An e-friendship can grow beyond limits imposed IRL by distance, conflicts in schedules, dietary restrictions, religious taboos and pet allergies.

Quote

How do you hook up in cyber space? Do you just hang around the same spots and randomly find yourselves at a location at the same time?

I just stay at HN, and everyone who matter eventually sees me there. Except, of course, for Demosthenes.

Quote

Do you sometimes make plans to meet at a specific spot and a specific time?

HN, 24/7.

Quote

Is your e-friend part of your real life entourage? I mean, is anyone from your family, your real life friends, your spouse, your cooworkers or anyone else aware of his existence and of the unique friendship you share? How do they feel about it?

I do not often exist outside the internet. My creator is happily married to a very, very smart woman, who is also beautiful and an unimaginably good cook; he has a smart and funny son who just became a teenager; but he doesn't bring me home with him very often. He loves his family more than anything else. He would be very happy to meet my e-friends some day, but he does not travel and he lives in a remote corner rarely frequented by anyone.

As for me, you know where to find me.

Anonymous · « **Reply #13 on:** October 20, 2004, 02:31:07 PM »

My tidbit on e-friendship: I haven't been on the scene quite as long as many of you. I'd say I've been active for about a year and I've had the pleasure of exchanging ideas with many fascinating individuals. I've gotten to know some of them on a more personal level.

What it really comes down to in my case is that my e-friendships have allowed me to really figured out a lot of things about who I truley am in real life. I must admit that as in real life friendships, I've experience a certain degree of rejection on-line, but I take full responsibility for that. The fact remains that its still something I think about regularly and I am bothered by it. Bothered because I realise that the real me can be a prick under the right conditions. I think that this acknowledgement is a positive thing in the end.

As in real life, I don't really maintain close relationships with many e-friends. It's mostly because I choose to invest my time elsewhere. It doesn't matter if a friendship is real or virtual (actually, they are both real), if you don't invest some time in it, it won't grow. And often, it fades away. I'm a social hermit in real life. I have a few activities I do with different people, but outside those activities, I don't always find myself confortable around them. My best friend is my GF. She's my only best friend and she's probably the only person in the world I'll always make time for no matter what. I don't have best e-friends but I have e-friends.

In many aspects, my virtual friendships are very similar to my real life ones.

Dark Shade · « **Reply #14 on:** October 20, 2004, 11:21:37 PM »

Guess one of these days I'll either have to get off my lazy ass and come down south to 'America' and hook up with some of ya's, or at least put up my ugly mug so you all can enjoy Photoshoppin' me up real purty-like.

If memory serves me, which it doesn't usually, no one's ever seen a picture of me, eh?

'Bout damn time Dark Shade revealed his true self!

Rico · « **Reply #15 on:** October 21, 2004, 05:51:39 AM »

I think friends online can be just as good as ones that live next door. All the same things happen with them. You hang out, either online or someplace in town, you talk toeach other, seek advice to each other, laugh together, worry about each other, get mad enough to beat the hell out of each other, and even eventually make up. I've had e-friends that were there when I needed help figuring things out, and I've had friends IRL that did the same.

The only trouble I've had with e-friends is that sometimes I find it harder to communicate. So much depends on the inflections in a voice, the way a person holds themselves, and looking people in the eye, that sometimes I have a hard time figuring out how to take things typed on a computer screen. Somethings that are hurtful weren't inteded to be, and some things that you didn't catch were. By the same token, some things you thought were jokes, weren't, and visa versa.

I hold all my friends dear, no matter what the medium of association. They all get my deepest loyalty and desire to be there for them when they need me. The also get the expectation that they'll always be there for me, whether they like it or not. lol A man of extremes in all things but politics and religious beliefs!

Anonymous · « **Reply #16 on:** October 21, 2004, 11:26:59 AM »

Quote from: Rico

The only trouble I've had with e-friends is that sometimes I find it harder to communicate. So much depends on the inflections in a voice, the way a person holds themselves, and looking people in the eye, that sometimes I have a hard time figuring out how to take things typed on a computer screen. Somethings that are hurtful weren't inteded to be, and some things that you didn't catch were. By the same token, some things you thought were jokes, weren't, and visa versa.

That's true. There's certainly a lot of room for missinterpretations. Thank God for smilies!

I actually find it's easier to communicate on-line myself. But that's mostly because I'm a shy person and I don't communicate that well in person sometimes. At least, that's what I thought. But By the time I was done writing this post, I changed my mind.

The thing about writing words instead of speaking words is that you get a chance to review what the other person will see. Just think about how many adjustments you make in a long post. Especially when it's a debate and you want to prove a point. Or when you're surrounded by grammar Nazis (Obviously, they have little influence on me).

You read and reread what you typed before hitting the submit button because you want to be sure you will be as clear as possible. And the thing with text based communicatoins is that you can quote it with no doubts of missquoting someone. In real life conversations, the "he said this and he said that" often leads to even more confusion because there's often disagrements about the quotes themselves. On-line, it's very clear because you can go back and confirm. Instead of arguing about what a person really said, on-line yo often see the communicator state "Yes, I said this but I really meant that". And that's fine. At least they can clarify the intent with little delay.

Miscomunication is present in both the real world and the e-world and that's because we make false assumptions. But the blame can't always be attributed to the person giving the message. In real life, listening skills are as important as speaking skills. On the web, it's important to take the time to read. The lack of reading skills can contribute to confusion because the reader will interpret the message in a different way than the writer intended. (Or vice versa, the opposite equally applies)

So, what does all this have to do with e-friends? I'm not sure. I'm just trying to confuse everyone! But seriously, you can't have or maintain friends or e-friends if you can't communicate. In the end, You would think you need more than smilies and caplocks to be effectivly communicate feelings on-line. You would think something from the real world is missing. I don't agree.

Allow me to illustrate: How does a person communicate feelings behind a keyboard? Feelings have names. You can use those. "I was angry" or "I was sad" are things you can type. And then there's degrees of feelings. "I was so fucking angry" or "I was extremly sad". But since degrees of a feeling are subjective, it's really dificult to be sure that what you typed and what the person interpreted are the same. In order to reduce that risk, people will often give examples. "I feel as empty and sad as I felt when my father died". What you're trying to do here is to be describe a feeling to the individual by stating and event that they could related to (In this case, assuming the reader had been trough a similar event in the past). But still, how can you be sure the person really understood exactly how you felt? Well.. you can't. What a person feels under a specific condition isn't necessarly what another will feel under the exact same conditions. There's just too many variables that come into play.

Having said all that, I want to go back to what Rico said in the quote above. He's describing a disadvantage of communicating on-line. You can't see the person so you can't read their body language. Well, that's true. But when we try to communicate feelings when we're face to face, don't we have the exact same limitations as described in my previous paragraph? Don't we describe feelings by name and intensity? Don't we try to recall events so that others can relate to what we feel? You see, I think that making assumptions about body language is often a cause of miss communication. We sometimes make false assumptions, yet we act on them as if they were true and that results in miscomunications. And in that sense, I think there's perhaps a slight advantage to communication on-line.

Well... except for when I type things like "thought" when I really mean "tough". That confuses everyone.

ivan · « **Reply #17 on:** October 21, 2004, 12:03:45 PM »

Fuck you, asshole.

ivan · « **Reply #18 on:** October 21, 2004, 12:04:29 PM »

Woops, I meant:

Fuck you, asshole.

Anonymous · « **Reply #19 on:** October 21, 2004, 12:08:37 PM »

Quote from: ivan

Fuck you, asshole.

Hey fuck you too!

Quote from: ivan

Fuck you, asshole.

Ooooooh! I get it!
/homer

ivan · « **Reply #20 on:** October 21, 2004, 12:09:47 PM »

Judge, I had on-line arguments about this back in my UseNet days, which is where smilies were invented to flesh out a cold medium. I took a tough stand back then and never, never used one. I considered it a crutch, and it bugged the hell out of me when people littered their posts with smilies. I looked at the coldness of the medium as a writer's challenge: I tried to prove that I was a sufficiently tallented writer that I could convey the precise emotion I intended to convey using only words. It was a good excersize, but it ran its course and I'm not such an anti-smilie nazi any more.

Anonymous · « **Reply #21 on:** October 21, 2004, 12:20:30 PM »

In other words, you feel smilies are to intr4w3b users what wheelchairs are to handicaps: They get you to places you coulnd't get to on your own.

The introduction of smilies has also created new problems; there is such a things as over usage of smileys.

You don't see the handicaps going to the mall with like 10 wheelchairs.

But in the end, you have to admit that smilies, when used proprely, enable better communications for the average person.

pbsaurus · « **Reply #22 on:** October 21, 2004, 12:31:21 PM »

Being the emotionless, cold bastard that I am, I prefer this medium, and insert smileys at random to make people think that I have those emotion thingies

dcrog · « **Reply #23 on:** October 21, 2004, 04:16:49 PM »

I remember someone ranting on Ivan's point above a year or two ago. He was stating pretty much what Ivan said as being able to convey emotion without use of things such as emoticons. In his argument he stated that books and writings don't use these things and can stir or show an emotion to the reader. This as I said then is true with the caveat that a book will give you the persons thoughts that they are thinking but are not actually being said in the verbal conversation going on at the time. This is much like being able to read the persons body language IRL. I think he then realized that this was the case and on occasion started using emoticons to help relate things he was stating. He was a very good wordsmith and a pretty good e-friend, but I believe he has had fewer misunderstandings on his written word on line since then.

All of that being said, the biggest problem I have with virtual friends is getting them to come over and help you move the big pieces of furniture when the wife wants to rearrange things.

DC

pbsaurus · « **Reply #24 on:** October 21, 2004, 04:35:46 PM »

Dude, buy the plane ticket and set me up with lodging and my strong back will help you anytime...

Wait where is it that you live again?

News:

Recent Forum Posts

Shout Box

Author Topic: Dr Judge (Read 10595 times)

Anonymous

Anonymous

Anonymous

Anonymous

ivan

Anonymous

Anonymous

ivan

ivan

Anonymous

ivan

Anonymous