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Author Topic: This happens at least once a day  (Read 6275 times)

Anonymous

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This happens at least once a day
« on: February 04, 2004, 11:42:14 AM »
http://www.geekforum.org/profile.php?mode=viewprofile&u=13" target="BLANK">http://www.gotthegeek.com/images/demo_avatar_kane_screen_sm.jpg"> Submitted by Demosthenes


*phone rings*

Me:  Hello?

Receptionist:  I have a "Sue" from (some company) on the line.

Me: (confused) Never heard of her.  Why's she want to talk to me?

Receptionist:  Well, she's been working with John on getting their new server set up and she needs help with something, but John's on the phone with someone else at the moment and she insisted on talking to someone, and you're John's backup.

Me: All right, put her through.

Sue:  Hello?

Me:  Hello, this is Demosthenes.

Sue:  Hi, I need some help with something.

Me:  What do you need?

Sue:  Well, I'm sure you're aware of what's been going on here, right?  

Me:  Uh, no.

Sue:  (impatient)  Well, John has been working with me for the past two days on getting our server set up!

Me  Okay.

Sue:  Well, he renamed the main share on the new server, so our drive mapping doesn't work for some of our workstations.  We can't get to a lot of our data because of that.  And your receptionist just told me he is on the phone with someone else.

Me:  Ah.  You just need to re-map the affected network drives on those workstations so that they point at the new share.

Sue:  I don't know how to do that.

Me:  It's pretty easy, actually.  I can walk you through it.  What's the name of the new share?

Sue:  I don't know.

Me:  That's okay, we can go browsing for it on the new server.  All you need to do is--

Sue:  That's not how John did it in the past.

Me:  Well if all he did was rename a share, all you have to do is browse to it from the workstations that are affected to the new server--

Sue:  I don't think that will work.  I don't know if the new server is on our network yet.

Me:  Well, you didn't let me finish--

Sue:  Look, I don't think you can help me.  You don't seem to know anything about our network.

Me:  Well of course I don't.  I've never even heard of your company before.

Sue:  I think I just need to talk to John.


*transfers stupid customer to John's voice mail*



Question:  If you want to talk to someone and they're not available, do you INSIST on talking to someone else anyway, even though you won't work with them and know they probably can't help you?

Answer:  Apparently, if you're stupid, then yes.
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Anonymous

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #1 on: February 04, 2004, 11:45:30 AM »
lol! How can you do that kind of work? I would shoot myself, or someone else, in no time.
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Xeno Ghost

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Re: This happens at least once a day
« Reply #2 on: February 04, 2004, 11:51:10 AM »
Quote from: Chris
Sue:  Hello?

Me:  Hello, this is Demosthenes.


That right there would've made me, if I was Sue, hang up on you.

I thought that was just a screen name, but...sheesh, your parents were that stoned?!

(lol, I hope you know I'm joking.)

Yeah, that's a pretty crazy conversation.  My friend also works as a tech support person for some company, and he's always telling me the weird stories that you guys have to deal with.  He had to fix some lady's computer the other day that was entirely in Spanish.  He doesn't speak Spanish, so he had to wing it.  lol  He did it too.
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Demosthenes

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #3 on: February 04, 2004, 11:54:30 AM »
The thing is, that's not really my job.  I rarely ever have to talk to clients.

We have customer service people that are the first line of support for software and procedural calls.  Issues get sent my way if they involve programming, damage to data, or other things our customer service people can't handle.  And even then, I almost never talk to the customer directly... I usually just deal with our in-house customer service people and connect to the clients' systems remotely to do what I need to do once I get the information I need.

HOWEVER, I'm also part of our IT department, and while that's mostly for our own networking/hardware stuff, when local clients that we provide IT services to need help with something, and our two other IT guys aren't available, I'm it.

The vast majority of such clients know that talking to someone totally unfamiliar with their network or server is useless, so if John or the other guy are unavailable, they either call back, or just ask our receptionist to put them into their voice mails.

It's just the occasional odd Stupid that insists on talking to SOMEONE, even though 99% of the time, all I end up doing is just putting them into John's voice mail myself, a few minutes later.

Sometimes it's the same person I've done that to before.

Them:  Well you're no help at all!  John's the only one that knows anything about our server!

Me:  Then why the fuck did you insist on talking to me to begin with?  John has voice mail, and our receptionist is fully capable of transferring you to it.  Just like this!

*click*



Okay, so I don't say that, but that's what I'm thinking most of the time.   :evil:
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Demosthenes

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #4 on: February 04, 2004, 11:59:47 AM »
Wow.

Talk about incredible timing.

I just had someone I work with come over to me and start this particularly stupid discussion:


Them:  John and Steve are both out.

Me:  I know.

Them:  Well I need something.

Me:  What.

Them:  The server we usually run (some application) on is running out of space.

Me:   :?:  Which server now?  We have no such server.

Them:  John just set it up for us the other day so that we can move (this application) to it because it wasn't running very well on the other one.

Me:  Uh.... okay.

Them:  Well it's running out of space.  The other day when this happened, John did something to clean it up, but it's running low on disk space again.

Me: Well what did he do?

Them:  I don't know.

Me: And what makes you think that I[/b] would know?



 :evil:
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Anonymous

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #5 on: February 04, 2004, 01:58:53 PM »
I'm suprised you didn't say format c:
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Xeno Ghost

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #6 on: February 04, 2004, 02:00:24 PM »
I'm surprised John works there.
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ivan

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #7 on: February 06, 2004, 02:03:03 PM »
Demosthenes, I'm having all kinds of trouble with our servers, and my partner, who usually takes care of that side of the operation, is out to lunch. Could you fix it, or walk me through some fixes? I think it's some kind of Windows system, because you have to use a mouse and the screen is all blue with white letters. Thanks, dude.
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xolik

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #8 on: February 06, 2004, 02:15:52 PM »
Quote from: ivan
the screen is all blue with white letters. Thanks, dude.




Load "*" ,8, 1
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Demosthenes

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #9 on: February 06, 2004, 02:56:32 PM »
Quote from: ivan
the screen is all blue with white letters. Thanks, dude.


Like this?
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Law

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #10 on: February 07, 2004, 01:06:43 AM »
Now, that was funny Xolik...
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DiscipleOfChaos

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« Reply #11 on: February 17, 2004, 09:58:07 PM »
Yeah Xolik... my dad had to come into my room to see why the hell I was almost falling out of my chair and making that horrible noise.

Note to self: breathing is important. Even when something hits you as really funny while you are really tired.
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Demosthenes

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #12 on: February 19, 2004, 03:54:12 PM »
A couple of subject-related conversations I've had today with a client:



Her:  We're having problems with our mail server.

Me: What's the problem?

Her:  Well, John was helping us with it this morning, but your receptionist told me that he went to lunch.  So I had her transfer me to you, because we still really need help.

Me:  Uh... okay.  Is there something I can help you with?

Her:  Well, it's still not working.

Me:  I assume you mean your mail server.  What did John do so far?

Her:  I don't know.

Me:  What kind of server is it?

Her:  I don't know.

Me: Is it up and running?

Her: I'm not sure.

Me:  (confused) Is there anything on the screen?  Is the server itself powered up?

Her:  I don't know where it is.

Me:  So you don't know what kind of server it is, where it's located, or anything else about it?

Her:  I really just need to speak to John.

:evil:

*transfers idiot client to John's voice mail*





Three hours later, the same client calls back.  John is still not back, because he got a call while out for lunch and went straight to a different client's location to handle an unrelated IT emergency.


Her:  Our mail is still not working.

Me:  Well John's still not back in the office.  He got another call while he was on lunch and he's not back yet.

Her:  I know.  But we really need some help with this.  

Me:  I don't know anything about your server.  I can't help you if I can't get a little more information.

Her:  John's the only one that knows.

Me:  He's not here.  Is there something I CAN help you with?

Her:  No, I don't think so.




UGH!  Then WHY did you insist on speaking to me, you fucking imbecile!?   I wasn't able to help you three hours ago, what makes you think I'll be able to help you now?  :evil:  :evil:  :evil:

From now on, I'm telling our receptionists that if this client calls and John's out of the building, they are to transfer them directly to John's voice mail and NOT to my extension.  It's totally pointless.
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pseudonymph

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This happens at least once a day
« Reply #13 on: February 19, 2004, 06:35:44 PM »
That's what I would do. Or when they call, say "One moment please", and transfer it to his voicemail.
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