Topic: *Guys* Need help describing something (Read 12012 times)

Mikekillerus · « **on:** November 26, 2006, 01:56:28 PM »

If you had to describe getting hit in the testes, how would you do it. My girlfriend doesnt think that it hurts at all and thinks its equal to getting punched in the arm. I need help in describing the type and amount of pain that comes from even being hit.

Leonidas · « **Reply #1 on:** November 26, 2006, 10:04:40 PM »

Think pain so intense that it would cause you to black out. Emphasize that.

Also mention that getting punched in the arm doesn't double you over or take you down. Or make you sick to your stomach, possibly causing you to throw up.

BizB · « **Reply #2 on:** November 27, 2006, 08:27:26 AM »

Quote from: Mikekillerus on November 26, 2006, 01:56:28 PM

If you had to describe getting hit in the testes, how would you do it. My girlfriend doesnt think that it hurts at all and thinks its equal to getting punched in the arm. I need help in describing the type and amount of pain that comes from even being hit.

kick her in the goodies and then tell her it's like that... only worse.

Agent_Tachyon · « **Reply #3 on:** November 27, 2006, 09:11:35 AM »

Yeah I've never heard of a person getting punched in the arm, then spewing blood and dying.

Evonus · « **Reply #4 on:** November 27, 2006, 07:43:23 PM »

Rip off one of her boobs and slap her with it.

Crystalmonkey · « **Reply #5 on:** November 28, 2006, 06:20:31 PM »

Quote from: BizB on November 27, 2006, 08:27:26 AM

kick her in the goodies and then tell her it's like that... only worse.

Apparently, kicking a girl in the crouch is supposed to hurt. I didn't realize, thought it would be similar to wearing a cup. Guess having a clitoris can be a bitch sometimes.

*shrugs*

Vespertine · « **Reply #6 on:** November 28, 2006, 08:01:25 PM »

When I was a kid, I had a boy's bike (with the bar stretching from the seat to the handlebars (or whatever the technical name is)). It was a ten speed with front and rear brakes. Well, as I was learning the ins and outs of braking with different brakes, I happened to ride pell-mell into the side of the house. I went up, over the handlebars, where i smacked my head on the side of the house. That knocked me back down...right onto that fucking crossbar...right in between my legs. Believe me when I tell you, I have never, ever felt pain like that a second time. I've had more than my share of injuries over the years, and the that was the most painful thing EVER. I firmly believe that a girl's naughty bits are just as sensitive to pain as a boy's are.

hackess · « **Reply #7 on:** November 28, 2006, 09:13:38 PM »

Quote from: Vespertine on November 28, 2006, 08:01:25 PM

I've had more than my share of injuries over the years, and the that was the most painful thing EVER. I firmly believe that a girl's naughty bits are just as sensitive to pain as a boy's are.

Ditto, except I fell at the playground and landed on my own goddamned heel. A foot in the groin hurts us just as much.

TheJudge · « **Reply #8 on:** November 29, 2006, 07:48:32 AM »

Quote from: Vespertine on November 28, 2006, 08:01:25 PM

I firmly believe that a girl's naughty bits are just as sensitive to pain as a boy's are.

Oh you are so wrong. I'm not saying your equipement isn't sensitive, but think of the mechanics. We have a dangling bag filled with unecessary and oversensitive pain receptors. You kick us in the nades, we get pain from the impact, followed immediatly by the bonus pain from the "squishing" factor. The pain then travels up in our abdomen and leaves us completely helpless on the ground, in the fetal position. If would could, we would suck our thumb, but unfortunatly, we are overtaken by the powerfull impulse of covering our our privates with both hands in a lame attempt to protect our most sacred body part.

jeee · « **Reply #9 on:** November 29, 2006, 10:15:42 AM »

I got a good free kick in the nuts while playing soocer three weeks ago. I threw up and had to sit for 20 minutes.

Chris · « **Reply #10 on:** November 29, 2006, 10:20:00 AM »

At least you didn't have to pay for it. That would have sucked if you had to pay to get kicked in the nuts.

TheJudge · « **Reply #11 on:** November 29, 2006, 10:34:02 AM »

To ensure that never happens, I offer a free kick in the nuts to anyone wishing to subject themselves to it*

*some conditions apply

Agent_Tachyon · « **Reply #12 on:** November 29, 2006, 05:33:46 PM »

I seem to recall Maddox having some sort of deal where he'd kick you in the balls for a small fee.

hackess · « **Reply #13 on:** November 29, 2006, 09:36:04 PM »

Quote from: TheJudge on November 29, 2006, 07:48:32 AM

Oh you are so wrong. I'm not saying your equipement isn't sensitive, but think of the mechanics. We have a dangling bag filled with unecessary and oversensitive pain receptors. You kick us in the nades, we get pain from the impact, followed immediatly by the bonus pain from the "squishing" factor. The pain then travels up in our abdomen and leaves us completely helpless on the ground, in the fetal position. If would could, we would suck our thumb, but unfortunatly, we are overtaken by the powerfull impulse of covering our our privates with both hands in a lame attempt to protect our most sacred body part.

Did you just call your balls unnecessary?

Vespertine · « **Reply #14 on:** November 29, 2006, 10:33:53 PM »

Quote from: TheJudge on November 29, 2006, 07:48:32 AM

Oh you are so wrong. I'm not saying your equipement isn't sensitive, but think of the mechanics. We have a dangling bag filled with unecessary and oversensitive pain receptors. You kick us in the nades, we get pain from the impact, followed immediatly by the bonus pain from the "squishing" factor. The pain then travels up in our abdomen and leaves us completely helpless on the ground, in the fetal position. If would could, we would suck our thumb, but unfortunatly, we are overtaken by the powerfull impulse of covering our our privates with both hands in a lame attempt to protect our most sacred body part.

So, replace the squishing factor with an unmoveable wall. That's what happens when your crush your girlie parts. There no "crumple zone". Rather, your girlie parts get initially impacted, driven instantaneously into your pubis, and then crushed there. Based on that, I maintain my original stance that it's just as painful for females as for males.

Agent_Tachyon · « **Reply #15 on:** November 30, 2006, 01:03:13 AM »

I'm looking forward to the day when they either figure out how to wire up ball nerves to women who become men, or the full reproductive aparatus to men who become women, just to finally have someone capable of delivering children as well as being kicked in the nads (and documenting the experiences on whatever futuristic blog thingy they'll have in the future).

I'm quite certain that childbirth is more painful by many orders of magnitude, but it would be interesting to hear a real comparative description from an objective third party.

TheJudge · « **Reply #16 on:** November 30, 2006, 07:58:55 AM »

Quote from: catwritr on November 29, 2006, 09:36:04 PM

Did you just call your balls unnecessary?

Let's just say they're in the way more often than necessary.

Unnecessary? No. In fact, I'm currently trying to use them for what they were designed for.

Quote from: Vespertine on November 29, 2006, 10:33:53 PM

Based on that, I maintain my original stance that it's just as painful for females as for males.

Because pain is subjective and cannot be measure quantitavely, we'll never know. In either cases, it's just not a pleasant experience for anyone.

ivan · « **Reply #17 on:** November 30, 2006, 01:30:06 PM »

It's beyond the mere crushing of sensitive tissue. We're talking trauma to the testis, which are glands. It's like having your eyeballs gouged, or getting punched in the throat. But worse. The brain knows something really, really, really bad is happening.

Demosthenes · « **Reply #18 on:** November 30, 2006, 06:17:27 PM »

All I know is, side-by-side for comfort, front-to-back for speed.

ivan · « **Reply #19 on:** November 30, 2006, 06:39:13 PM »

And stacked for going down narrow chutes.

Demosthenes · « **Reply #20 on:** November 30, 2006, 06:53:25 PM »

Quote from: ivan on November 30, 2006, 06:39:13 PM

And stacked for going down narrow chutes.

That doesn't happen very often, but good point.

LuciferSam · « **Reply #21 on:** December 01, 2006, 08:36:10 AM »

You should tell her that it would feel to her the same as the experience of her walking in on him having a wild caligulesque orgiastic burlesque ho-down with her mother, younger sister, and best friend. And clowns. Except in the loins.

But worse.

xolik · « **Reply #22 on:** December 01, 2006, 01:33:24 PM »

Well I'm upper upper class high society
God's gift to ballroom notoriety
And I always fill my ballroom
The event is never small
The social pages say I've got
The biggest balls of all

I've got big balls
I've got big balls
They're such big balls
And they're dirty big balls
And he's got big balls
And she's got big balls
(But we've got the biggest balls of them all)

And my balls are always bouncing
My ballroom always full
And everybody comes and comes again
If your name is on the guest list
No one can take you higher
Everybody says I've got
Great balls of fire

I've got big balls
Oh I've got big balls
And they're such big balls
Dirty big balls
And he's got big balls
And she's got big balls
(But we've got the biggest balls of them all)

Some balls are held for charity
And some for fancy dress
But when they're held for pleasure
They're the balls that I like best
My balls are always bouncing
To the left and to the right
It's my belief that my big balls
Should be held every night

We've got big balls
We've got big balls
We've got big balls
Dirty big balls
He's got big balls
She's got big balls
(But we've got the biggest balls of them all)

(We've got big balls)
(We've got big balls)

And I'm just itching to tell you about them
Oh we had such wonderful fun
Seafood cocktail, crabs, crayfish
(But we've got the biggest balls of them all)

DiscipleOfChaos · « **Reply #23 on:** December 01, 2006, 01:50:54 PM »

Quote from: ivan on November 30, 2006, 01:30:06 PM

It's beyond the mere crushing of sensitive tissue. We're talking trauma to the testis, which are glands. It's like having your eyeballs gouged, or getting punched in the throat. But worse. The brain knows something really, really, really bad is happening.

Also they are connected to all manner of sensitive internal organs which get yanked out of place during a trauma to the balls themselves. That's one reason the pain radiates its way up into the torso so quickly.

TheJudge · « **Reply #24 on:** December 01, 2006, 11:38:28 PM »

Not to mention the headaches, proving that guys do in fact think with their penises.

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Author Topic: *Guys* Need help describing something (Read 12012 times)

Author Topic: Guys Need help describing something (Read 12012 times)