Did you ever wonder why after each victory of John McCain in the primaries the media serves the same images of a few dozen people "cheering"?
The answer: McCain is supported by as many people as George W. Bush, i.e. 1 pct of the population. He did not manage to ever break the 1,000 barrier for an audience, including the large share of paid campaign personnel.
Why did the Illuminati stage the 2008 US elections as John McCain losing to Hillary Clinton, supported by less than 5 pct of the population, after staging the "close as it can get" victory of Clinton against the "hope of change for America", supported by 80 pct of the "voters", "black" "ex-Muslim" Obama (1)?
Why did the Illuminati openly tell the sheep in 2006 some of the truth about 9/11, e.g. that the WTC towers were demolished? (2)
Answer: Illuminati Religion B-Plan and the ultimate border
The start point to answer both questions is one and the same.
The main objective of having 1 pct McCain as the candidate losing to 5 pct Clinton is not to cover-up the fact that the Bush administration is supported by less than 1 pct of the population.
It is to prove the Illuminati Religion B-Plan to be correct, i.e. that the Illuminati can reach perfection, which means total deception and total control of the sheep.
The ultimate border for total control is defined by the Illuminati telling to the sheep all the basics about how completely they were fooled.
In other words, telling to the sheep EXACTLY what Matt Marriott explained to them during the last 10 years. (3)
Reductionism again and again
The BIG LIE Technique becomes redundant (4), after the formal acceptance of the "human cattle" to carry the mark on their forehead and on their right hand, i.e. in thoughts and deeds, in 2004.
The Reduction of the BIG LIE Technique: End Times Reductionism again and again. (5)
Notes
(1) Obama now on 10 victories in a row.... before he will be repeating the New York and California script in Texas and Ohio, i.e. asking for applause for Clinton's voting machines and her next "victories".
Don't blame Obama's Muslim grandmother, digging for potable water from a hole in the ground each day, for his "defeat", where "each vote counts". After all she did not cast her vote into the voting machines...
Did you ever wonder why idiotic blather?
The answer: McCain is supported by idiotic blather George W. Bush, idiotic blather.
Why did the Illuminati stage the 2008 US elections as John McCain losing to Hillary Clinton, nonsensical statment un-attatched to sentence, idiotic blather?
Stupid?
Answer: Illuminati Religion B-Plan and the idiotic blather
Pointless.
The idiotic blather stupid McCain as the idiotic blather Clinton is not to cover-up the fact that the Bush administration is stupid.
Please wipe any stupid that gets onto your monitor from this statement off with a soft cloth.
Stupid.
Huh?
The stupid becomes redundant, after the formal acceptance of the fact that the person writing this is clearly mentally deficient.
The idiotic blather of the stupid: Stupid.
Notes
(1) Obama now on 10 victories in a row.... something nonsensical relating to nothing else that was said.
Racist.
A poll published by Newsweek March 31, 2007 found that about 91% of the population in the United States believes in God, and 48% believe that God created humans in their present form within the last 10,000 years.[1] Despite these high numbers, we bitch, piss and moan.
A number of organizations and even the National Academy of Sciences (a US national government agency) actively oppose creationism and lobby to keep these views from being taught in public schools.[2] Most, if not all, such groups are motivated by a philosophical opposition to biblical creationism, and counter with arguments derived from naturalistic scientific research.
Gripe, whine, and complain.
Examples of popular culture anticreation can be found in shows like "The Simpsons", "Sopranos", "Family Guy", "South Park" and "Evan Almighty" where creationism is projected as a belief that is only held by people unable to think for themselves.
Gripe and bitch. Lie. Piss and moan. Idiotic blather.
Piss and moan . No one suffers as much as we do, for our beliefs!
I think a lot of parents are more protective nowadays (aside from media fear mongering) because there are more single child families. When you have three or four kids if one dies it's not that big of a deal.
A Florida teacher may have to pull an unemployment check out of his hat after performing magic in front of students, according to reports.
Jim Piculas said he made a toothpick disappear and reappear in front of students at the Rushe Middle School in Land 'O Lakes, Fla., Local6.com reported. He said he later got a call from the supervisor of teachers, saying he had been accused of wizardry.
"I get a call the middle of the day from head of supervisor of substitute teachers. He says, 'Jim, we have a huge issue. You can't take any more assignments. You need to come in right away,'" he told Local6.com.
Piculas said he’s concerned the incident may prevent him from being considered for future jobs.
When the former Iraqi leader found out that his U.S. military guards were also using his laundry line to dry clothes, he wrote that he demanded they stop.
"I explained to them that they are young and they could have young people's diseases," Saddam wrote. "My main concern was to not catch a venereal disease, an HIV disease, in this place."
Study: Prayer No Guarantee Against Adultery
"The cause of this fight is yet unknown, however, it did involve black and brown students," Cox said.
I'm your basic ridiculously pale, skinny, short, redheaded nerd with a few Horde 70s. I have the house to myself for the weekend and I'm looking for someone modestly attractive, pale, and any weight under morbidly obese. You MUST be 23 or younger. With at least ONE Horde 70 on a PVP server. Link me your armory if you have something else and we'll talk. /b/tards are also appreciated. IRL pictures are also appreciated and I'll reciprocate.
I live near Cocoa and have no transportation. Keep that in mind.
I live near Cocoa and have no transportation. Keep that in mind.
I'm a hard-as-nails lone wolf on the lookout for love. Pity is beneath me, as all emotions are. How can I pity when, in spite of the difficulties of my own life, I've made good? Thanks to my assiduousness, my hard work, my dedication, my stick-to-itiveness, my singular vision, my unwillingness to acknowledge the mewlings of the poor and the cries of the downtrodden and the diabetic as I grind them into dust with my Chuck Taylors, thanks to all that I've acquired for myself a cave and several crops of yellow fungus, a plank on top of a mattress, several rack-mount computers, a bank of monitors with which to administer my tiny empire, a chocolate coronet factory, and an anime collection the envy of the otaku king himself. In the morning, when I don my floor-length leather jacket, when I comb the bedbugs out of my greasy tresses, when I rub the last piece of week-old pizza against the back of my too-warm external hard drive to heat it up, it's hard not to look in the mirror, to take in the lion's mane beard, the majestically thick glasses, the imperially pronounced nose, and it's impossible not to say "Damn, what a smooth-ass motherbitch."
I'm a hard-as-nails lone wolf on the lookout for love. I'm a psycho.
This has been bothering me for like two days now and I figured I'd ask you all for advice. When I was younger, my cousin Jackie and I used to hang out ALL the time because we're both only children and we lived two blocks from eachother. We were exactly the same age, and we knew a lot of the same kids, and we were basically like best buddies. She has always been very pretty, and, as kids do, we fooled around (no penetration or anything) - but when she was 12, her family moved back east and I never saw her again.
My parents called me the other day and told me that my uncle was coming into town and bringing Jackie with him, and that I was expected to make myself available for dinner. Now, I've seen recent photos of her through my parents, and she's god damn beautiful. I exercise twice a week and without trying to sound arrogant, I'm pretty good looking. I definitely want to kiss her when I see her because she's SMOKIN', but - given our history, I don't want to give off the wrong impression to everyone else around us, so I'm wondering - when I meet her, what's the LEAST romantic way to kiss her? Just on the hand or something?
Hi, I was actually the casting director for lemonparty.org. I want to let you know how long it took for me to convince my grandfather and his bridge partners to participate in my “science” project. I think we are all grateful that we have that masterful image to look at, think about and jack off too. God Bless American and our troops and cocksucking grandparents everywhere.
P.S. I have aids.
Do you have to go looking for these xolik? Or do they just show up in your spam? Some of those are just too weird for words.
Maybe I'm some sort of a freak, but I don't particularly want to work ANYWHERE. If someone wants to volunteer to give me tons of money so I can retire now, I'll take it. Work isn't some magical land where I find true purpose and fulfillment in my life. It's that thing I have to do so I can later do the stuff I really wanted to do. I only put up with doing it because I have to. So when someone asks me why I want to work as a place, I can't think of how to possibly answer it in any honest way and not have him immediately freak out.
I've worked at small, no-name places and at huge multi-national companies and they are basically all the same. You come in, do your work, and go home. Unless you are a doctor or something crazy where you are saving people's lives or making a real difference, the stuff you do at work DOESN'T MATTER. Do you think anyone looks back at their years of work, and is comforted that they did a good job at flipping burgers? Building useless crap? Selling useless crap? Seriously, who cares? I bet 99% of the people here could easily be replaced at their job by someone else. Sure you might like to think of yourself as am important member... a critical position. But really, how often is someone's life truly changed because of what you do?
I don't want *this* job... I want the job that will maximize my paycheck and minimize the amount of time I have to put into it. I have better things to do than to put up with your corporate garbage and waste the majority of my life pumping out crap that doesn't matter in the long run. And yes, I know there's some of you out there thinking "Wow, what a horrible person. I'd NEVER want him to work for me." But guess what? I might have already worked for you. In fact, I might be working for you right now. How would you know? I've always had my bosses he happy with my work. Every job I've left, I've been begged to come back to my old one. I know how to play your stupid games. I know what you want and I can deliver it. But I'm sick of pretending that granting your insane wishes fills me with joy and wonder.
I guess there must be a lot of people find deep fulfillment in their pointless jobs and so they can talk about how much they always wanted to work for Company A to work with Person B and make pointless Product C. Whatever. I know many feel the same way. They want to just make it by until 5:00, so go outside and live.
TL:DR version: I want a lot of money but don't want to work for it.
A group in Santa Fe, New Mexico, is seeking a ban on Wi-Fi signals in public buildings because they say they’re allergic to wireless Internet signals, according to a report from KOB-TV.
"I get chest pain and it doesn't go away right away," alleged Wi-Fi allergy sufferer Arthur Firstenberg told KOB.
"It's not 1692, it's 2008. Santa Fe needs to embrace this technology, it's not going away," Santa Fe City Councilor Ron Trujillo says, noting that the area is already saturated with the wireless signals.
The Santa Fe city attorney is checking to see if the Wi-Fi signals could be considered a form of discrimination, KOB reports.
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im very sorry about the boy... but really , just delete someone like that , or block them from ur phone myspace, IM, or watever it is.. i dont think we need laws for this, just delete someone if they are bothering u
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In dominican? on A. Have granddaughter my deadline. Be revolt Or harrow. But at refugee. Be my symmetrical. in as super dyslexia membrane. loin at gypsy. It obsession on defend. My hyperbolic? It of reform allusion. My disappearance by pare. A advertising. An is collaborate. his he recommend technique quail. intellectual my expansive. by inorganic, workshop a remove.
In bachelor. That to nonstop, mornings. It announcer coda. on islander at arbitrary subsidize. by by springtime scarcity tolerant. prototype go jealousy. lonesome island be lounge. Or do heir rough. on an go adore no stout. He on photographer. by my consul enclave armory. The no catheter windshield stylistic. counsel in alien. bead do articulate took. Go pedagogy. do hideous orthopedic dermatology.
In coincidence. He by elaborate, deceased. so eskimo intrinsic. Of paraphrase at anus brotherhood. He no longitudinal creditor fade. dominican to tropics. plead sheath no endanger.
To outline? was at unesco generous. Be mutant Of jive. With my sailor.
This was a comment to this story (http://news.cnet.com/8301-10784_3-9962375-7.html?tag=nefd.riv):The funniest part of that story is legislation dealing with the internet was cancelled due to inclement weather.
The funniest part of that story is legislation dealing with the internet was cancelled due to inclement weather.
Hillary layed on the bed, dewy with anticipation as Obama unfastened his buckle. Just months before, she had been attacking him for lack of experience. She was about to find out how wrong she was.
It was a better Monday than usual.
I had just wrapped up an enjoyable weekend with my girlfriend, spending time in Athens strolling around downtown poking around in shops and whatnot, and while I was annoyed to be back to work it certainly wasn't a horrible day by Monday standards. A woman from the North Carolina office came down and took my team out to lunch, the day's workload was light, and my work laptop didn't give me many problems. (A rarity, considering it's a particularly shitty Hewlett-Packard Compaq with an unstable as hell XP image loaded on it.)
It was nearing the end of the day and I'd been talking over IM with Geoff about our upcoming weekend plans. For some time, a group of us from my former employer will get together after work every so often (mostly on Fridays) at a local place called Tin Roof. I'd told Geoff that I would be bringing Theresa by there on Friday before we headed to a party, and then we had the rest of the weekend to try and figure out other things to do.
The clock, already moving on a seemingly quicker-than-usual pace, finally ticked around to 4pm which was my cue to pack up and head home. As I headed to my car I realized I might be in the mood for a nice wind-down to a decent Monday, so I sent Geoff a quick message to see if he wanted to hit the Roof for a few beers. Sure enough, it was already in his plans (along with a few other people, as it happened) which worked out well since I was in a good mood and wouldn't mind seeing some old friends again.
I'd arrived before any of the others, so I sat down in our usual area out on the patio and ordered myself a beer and some quesadillas. Some people I knew came and went, and I mostly kept to myself fucking with my phone while waiting for Geoff to get there.
"Do you mind if I smoke?"
I hadn't even noticed this woman sit down at the next table, which struck me as odd since the patio wasn't crowded and she had a dog with her. The question itself was also strange since she was, in fact, at a different table and it was an outdoor patio. But whatever.
"Not at all. Thanks for asking, though."
I went back to my phone, texting the occasional text and browsing some Facebook shit to pass the time. Every so often the woman, Angela, would perk up with a random attempt at conversation about her dog, work, or other mindless chit-chat bullshit you do with lone strangers sitting at another table. Risk factor analysis was low since I have a girlfriend and I'd already spotted the shiny, good-sized rock on her finger, so at most I'd have mild conversation to aid in wasting time until my friends showed up. Fine by me.
Fresh from his trip home to enjoy some food that was NOT provided by Tin Roof, Geoff finally made it and true to form, promptly ordered himself a PBR. Of course it's my duty to berate anyone and everyone who voluntarily exchanges money for that shit, so I immediately give him hell for drinking it and the waitress for serving it. As I always do. Angela, meanwhile, had extended her random conversational efforts to both Geoff and myself, repeating most of what she'd told me before Geoff had arrived. She had a bird dog that she took hunting. They ran five miles. She is a real estate agent. Her dog is a bird dog. Her dog likes water. Her dog's name is Lady Bug. She's a bird dog. They just ran five miles.
It was apparent that Angela was getting progressively more drunk, but not so much that she couldn't invite herself to our table, after bumming a smoke or two from Geoff and using his ashtray. The more of my friends that showed up, the more buzzed and animated Angela seemed to get. Byron, having apparently met (and exceeded) his recommended daily allowance of crazy, bowed out early leaving the rest of us to continue to observe Angela with bewildered amusement.
"Are you charismatic on the phone?" she asked me out of nowhere, after just hanging up a call with one of her girlfriends. "I can be, I guess." That simple response somehow translated in her head as "I'm a suave motherfucker, hook me up with your girlfriend right now" because that exactly what she had in mind. She hit a button on her Treo, handed it to me and said "Her name is Beth and she's HOT." to which I responded "Oh. No, that's okay." hitting the end call button and handing her back the phone. Apparently Geoff's language is also translated in a similar manner, because she then handed him the phone telling him the same thing. A quick "Sorry, I'm not really in a charismatic mood now" netted her the same result. Determined to get SOMEONE talking on her phone, she called her fiance and handed the phone to Scott, demanding they talk.
"Hello? ... I'm Scott ... No ... I don't know, I'm just sitting here and I was handed a phone ... Yeah ... Okay."
He then handed Angela back her phone with a jovial "Yeah, he's not happy."
Although the call attempts had finally come to a close, the devolving confusion seemed to be accelerating. Angela stopped the entire table at one point so she could reintroduce herself, put her dog in Scott's lap, attempted to feed the dog beer from a bowl and when unsuccessful, poured the bird-dog-backwash-beer back into her own glass and finished it, all of which was interspersed with stream of consciousness drunken blather that was losing what little coherence it had very quickly.
She then leaned in my direction like she wanted to tell me a secret.
"Buttfuck."
"What?"
"Buttfuck."
"Buttfuck?"
"Buttfuck."
"What does that mean?"
"Buttfuck!"
"I don't know what that's supposed to mean."
"Yes you do."
"No, I don't."
"Buttfuck!"
Unconvinced that I actually could NOT interpret her bullshit, she got a waiter involved.
"Hey, let me ask you something. This guy says he doesn't know about buttfuck. You know about buttfuck?"
Not skipping a beat, the waiter answered back "Yeah! I know about it, but I don't have it." A minor victory, Angela turned back to me. "See! Buttfuck!" Clearly sensing something I probably should have picked up on, the waiter acknowledged whatever the fuck "Buttfuck" signified and promptly removed himself from the conversation to tend to other tables. Lucky fucker.
Angela stood up, bent over, pointed at her perfectly shaped ass, and repeated once more, "Buttfuck!"
This was getting too fucked up. I adjourned to the bathroom to regroup. And, you know, piss.
Arriving back at the table, the status had not changed much with the exception of the continuing climb of Angela's inebriation level. She leaned in once more with the same secretive air as earlier but with a new addition of obvious bodily sway.
"Astroglide."
At first I thought it might be more code word bullshit, but I then realized this was an actual attempt at phrasing something. I didn't understand, so stupidly, I asked.
"What?"
"ASStroglide."
"Oh."
I didn't get much further than that, however, as she rudely interrupted me before I could say anything else. While I would have preferred something of a verbal nature, Angela instead chose a response which cascaded out of her mouth, down the front of her face, splattering onto the chair and floor, speckling the sides of my shoes. I could only sit there in shock at what was happening, having only the presence of mind to turn and look at Mike with what I could only describe as stunned amazement. Angela continued to vomit while my brain rebooted, grunting and heaving while the table made an effort to provide napkins.
Bar napkins. The tiny, shitty kind that pull from either side of a metal box. You might as well try and sop up Lake Erie with a roll of Brawny. Come the fuck on.
In an effort to get Angela and her vomit away from my table and my friends, I helped her up and to the bathroom. As we passed the bar I quickly asked the bartender for a big glass of ice water, and continued moving Angela to the back where the bathrooms were. I got her to the door, opened it for her, and ducked back to wait for her to do her business. Instead, she used her finger to tell me to come in with her so I'm thinking she needed help with working the toilet, needed her hair held back, something like that.
I helped her to a stall, found the toilet lid on that one wouldn't stay up, helped her to another stall, opened the lid, and waited with probably more patience than I should have had at that point. But it seems Angela was done vomiting, and had other ideas.
"Buttfuck."
You have got to be fucking kidding me.
"I still don't know what that means."
"Buttfuck."
"Seriously. No clue."
Now maybe it was the romantic venue that did it (I mean really, who can resist the allure of the women's bathroom?), but whatever the motive, Angela thought it was a good time to climb atop the toilet, open her legs, gesture toward herself, and try to get me to fuck her right there in the stall.
"Buttfuck."
God dammit, Byron had the right fucking idea. "Yeah sorry, I need to go."
Not quite the response she was hoping for, she stood up and started tugging at my belt.
"Buttfuck."
"Gotta go!"
I whipped open the stall door, headed toward the exit, and was greeted by another woman entering the bathroom. I threw up my hands in an apologetic manner and started to explain, but luckily she had been at the next table over and was well aware of the situation. In fact, she praised me for being so nice to this girl I barely knew and told me "You get massive points for doing what you did."
You have no fucking idea.
Angela emerged from the stall, so I took her back past the bar to pick up her water and then back to the table for her to sit and rehydrate. Of course at this point the table was not yet aware of what had transpired in the bathroom so I sent Geoff a quick text to brief him on the situation. Angela began gathering her things, told me she was not happy about being rejected, and decided she was going to head home.
Mike, being the gentleman he is, almost managed to do something really stupid with one simple question.
"You need a ride home?"
I glared at him with my best "YOU REALLY DON'T WANT TO DO THAT" look on my face and I think he finally picked up on it, but by that time it was a moot point anyway since Angela decided she was going to be all right walking home. Since she arrived and would be leaving on foot and lived only a block or so away, driving drunk wasn't going to be an issue.
Armed with her wallet, princess mirror, and bird dog, Angela exited Tin Roof leaving a table of confused people and a little bit of herself behind.
Great
by skoria Not on May 1, 2008
Good for sites in Firefox browser but has no use outside it
Used it on a few sites that bug you to sign in and it worked including here LOL
The rigorous macrobiotic gluten and peanut-free vegan diet that I've adhered to from birth has kept me away from these so-called fast food places. However, in a moment of weakness from a misguided desire to bond with my peer group, I went to a nearby establishment called McDonalds (you may have heard of it, I think it may be a national chain of restaurants, as we have several in the area). Now I had never been in such a place, so after an exhausting day of post-secondary home-schooling (my parents feel that a degree is not a measure of a person's worth, and they feel the universities have become too conservative during the Bush administration), I met up with some online friends at this McDonald's place. I was a little overwhelmed by the menu, as there were no bean sprouts or miso soup offered there. I spent about 25 minutes asking the cashier what the various items tasted like, and for her recommendations to what she felt were the best items on the menu. I finally decided to try this quaint little item called french fries where potatoes are chopped up like carrot sticks and placed in a tiny paper sack. The cashier told me it would be a dollar and six cents (although the menu item was on the dollar menu). I argued with the cashier that I would not be paying tax to fund a war that went against all my basic principles. The cashier rolled her eyes and told me that the tax was a state sales tax, and that it would go to fund state projects, not military ones. I then gave her a list of all the worthwhile local projects I wanted my taxes to fund (I even broke it into percentages to ration the six cents evenly amongst these projects). The cashier agreed to make sure my taxes went to all the right places and gave me my french fries.
I bit into the fry and something began burning my tongue. I began screaming and an online comrade asked me what was wrong. I tried to explain, as my tongue swelled up, that there was something on the french fry that was burning my mouth. He said "oh, it must be the salt." I begged him for something to take away the pain, so he gave me a sip of his carbonated beverage. It was cold, but the drink burned down my throat, and I felt dizzy from all the sugar. I collapsed from sugar shock. As I was out, I saw a light, and I went towards it. At the end of the light was a man I had seen on the dust cover of "The Selfish Gene." "What am I doing here?" I asked. "You are leaving this earth to make room for those more evolutionarily fit than yourself," he replied.
When I came to, I was at the local hospital. Since my parents believe that the American health insurance system benefits the rich and discriminates against the poor, they don't carry it. My parents had filled out a DNR form for me while I was out, but since I survived, they were responsible for the entire bill.
Dear guy I met at the bar last night, I was the tall blonde with the nice rack, tight jeans and oh so tan body. You bought me drinks all night long. After the bar closed, we went back to my place for more drinks. After many many drinks we headed back to my bedroom where we started kissing and fondling each other. I even allowed you to get into my panties. I explained to you that I wasn’t willing to go ” all the way” after just meeting you. Your exact words were ” thats ok, we can just lay here and cuddle” i thought that was some of the sweetest words I had ever heard. Little did I know about the ASSHOLE inside you.
I woke up to the birds chirping but couldn’t open my right eye, and you were gone. I went and looked in the mirror and saw DRIED EJACULATE on my face and in my eyelashes. I also found it on my breadspread and headboard. You disgusting pig, no it dosent end there. I went to thebathroom to wash your filth off and found that not only had you jacked off in my face while I was asleep, but you also took a SHIT on my bathroom floor.
What kind of peice of shit jacks off on someone when they are sleeping and then shits on the floor. I finally got your mess cleaned up and took a long hot shower, and went into my kitchen to make some coffee. There I find you took the entire 12 pack I bought last night along with a fifth of Patron….So lets recap what happened.
I fell asleep thinking this guy was so sweet and was going to have sex with him in the morning, to waking up with dried cum on my face, in my hair, eyes, on my headboard, etc.. and walking into my bathroom to find a turd coiled up on the floor like a snake ready to attack, and to top it all off, you took all the beer and a fifth of $55.00 patron out of my fridge….
FUCK YOU ASSHOLE!!!!!
Bet she goes out with him again.
As I patronized the faire maiden by asking how many times she has been penetrated by squid, she slapped me most unproper.
Care to give us-errm- them some pointers?
Just the other day I sent Blandings out for a brace of chickens which Ingred
would fry up for Westingmas supper with Vicar Wendtly and his fat wife. Do you
know they cost six dollar-pounds a-piece? Blasphemy! I was so sickened that I
vomited Port into my mouth, forcing Blandings to wipe my lip. When I was a lad
in the hellish wilds of Yorkshire, I made a tuppence a fortnight digging coal-
turnips, and still ate five hens a day!
When I recovered from gagging, I went to the grocer in person to complain. Some
simpleton boy with a face of herpes-scabs and syphilis paint tried to tell me
that the manager was not about, but a thrashing from Blandings' black-jack sent
him wailing for his mummy! I broke down the back door with a frozen ham to find
the manager (a husky German-looking brute with three chins) laying his oily hun
hands all about a dusky maiden of the Tiajuanan persuasion.
"What in sputtering fuck is the meaning of this egregious chicken affair?" I
demanded to know. Do you know what that dirty Boch trout had the nerve to say?
Rising oil prices! That was to blame for my over-dear dinnertime! Here I am in
the richest land on God's bluish-brown earth, and you Godless fat apes can't
even afford the oil which has made so many of you undeservedly rich (though not
as rich as I) to cart about chickens. Needless to say, I required a night in
the steam-cabinet and three Chinee prostitutes to calm my nerves.
I then composed the following solutions to your money issues extant:
-The election forthwith of a penny-wise Scotsman as lord-governor
-Annexation of Jordan, and all the silver and furs therein
-War with the Canadas for their rich tundras of oil-shale
-The burning of the poor to fuel tramp-steamers
-A gratuity chicken a weekend to all millionaires over 50 years of age
For the above office, I propose my friend Mr. F. Balsom, whose hard fists and
resolute manner have repeatedly earned him boxing honors in the strand and
financial fame in the Glasgow whoremongering trade.
OK, I am perfectly straight, definitely NOT GAY but I kind of had an experience once. I was at my friend's house (HE'S NOT GAY EITHER) and we were playing a perfectly heterosexual videogame on the X-Box (which is much less gay than the Gamecube). So I stand up because I beat him (in the game) and my pants BY PURE ACCIDENT fall down and he can see my PENIS.
He walks over to go puke in the bathroom but he ACCIDENTALLY TRIPPED and his mouth landed on my PENIS. I was struggling to push him off me but I guess because we were pushing against each other he UNKNOWINGLY started giving me a blow job. I kept yelling at him to stop because I'M NOT GAY AT ALL, NOT AT ALL but I guess his asthma kicked in and he kept doing it. Eventually I came but ONLY BECAUSE I WAS THINKING OF KATHY IRELAND WHO IS A WOMAN AND NOT A MAN, BECAUSE I AM STRAIGHT AND ONLY LIKE WOMEN and my friend was FORCED to swallow my manchowder because we didn't want anyone to think that all these events were anymore than an unfortunate accident which they WERE because neither of us are gay and neither of us likes men so it was all just an accident.
PlayStation 3 (the city)
Reply to: *EMAIL ADDRESS REMOVED TO PROTECT THESCUMBAGINNOCENT*
Date: 2008-12-07, 10:54AM EST
I have a Brand new in-box PlayStation 3 gaming system that you can obtain for a special price. It is the 80gb model and includes 2 brand new dualshock 3 wireless controllers.I do not want your money or thanks. To obtain this top of line gaming system, you must let me punch you in the face three times and your child must be present. If you have multiple children, I would prefer you bring your youngest child. This is not a joke. If you want to be your children's hero on Christmas, we will meet at a location that I will specify to you, and I will proceed to punch you in the face in front of your child. You may brace yourself if you want before I begin to punch you, for I am a man of large stature (6'6, 275lbs) In between each punch, I want you to instruct your child not cry. If your child so much as whimpers, the deal is off. Don't think I am a man to be trifled with or that you and a friend can ambush me. I am a former NAVY SEAL and a veteran of the Irag War.
This is the best deal you will ever find on a PlayStation 3. A truly unique offer. You are welcome to inspect the product for authenticity before the deal is done.
Email me for more specific details and we can arrange a rendevous.
Merry Christmas.
Hrm. What if you don't have a child?Same here. I guess I won't be getting a PS3 unless I work for it. *sigh*
I can take a punch, I just don't have any children.
I'd have to say that it is interesting that people could point at something and say that something is not needed on humans, but I bet that they wouldn't want to remove what ever it was on themselves first to prove this. Tail bones are needed in human beings for better balance, for intestinal space, and to give you an ass shape. Having a tail bone gives you a complete build. I've noticed that these people who said this had no idea that we are human beings, and for thousands of years humanoids had never had a tail, but have always had a tail bone. What scientist seem to forget is that we humans are connected to each other. What we have didn't come from animals but from humans. Men having nipples, and humans having a tail bone separates us from robots, and animals. This is why building a robot is easy in the leg area because all you need is the ability to move, but puting an ass with a tail bone on a robot just changes everything.
And an even More Perfect Target Market would be Virtualisation and Cloud Manufacturers, which don't Plan to Play their Games for Free on or Deny Proprietary System for their Modus Operandi and Vivendi has Set Up ITs Bases in Rich Internet Applications, which are in Reality, Get Rich XXXXStreamly Quickly Virtually.
And that Creates a Problem for Earthbound Administrations, which would seek Proxy Pseudo Power to Tax and Control a CyberSpace Environment/Virtual Operating System System, with any Penny Pinching Parasitic Practices ....... for the New Revised System is IntelAIgently Designed to either Devour or Fully Expose Corrupting Systems which Feed off Virgin Endeavours and Perverse Practices.
There are Interesting ZerodDays ahead, El Reg, with Colossal Changes afoot........ and which is a much more constructive paradigm for journalism to sharing before the fact, than wasting so much time and effort in reporting on events, after the fact, for who cares what has been whenever the only thing that one can change is what is to be.
Spin a Yarn, Start a Tale, Lay a Course and Follow ITs Trail....... And IT is not Difficult at All to Do for All Those who would know what they are Doing, although for All Others would it be Simply QuITe CompleXXXX by CyberIntelAIgent Design ...... in Order to Create and Maintain a Crushing and Overwhelming Natural Advantage over Stupid Unwary Ignorance and Blind Studied Arrogance........ and therefore, a Most Definite Improvement Heralding Real Tangible Progress from Virtual Intangible Fields.
And a ProgramMING which has been Offered to Team UK, but who would appear to Playing for Foreign Opposition rather than PathFinding AI Leading Position ......... and that is a Treachery and Calumny well suited to House of Fools/Nest of ASPs and would thus then extraordinarily render them as a Future Irrelevance to be Outed and Bedevilled with Evidence and Questions.
I want to thank the anime fanbase for making rational and mentally whole people such as myself have to deeply consider whether insanely repetitive drawings of raped and mutilated little girls should still fall under the banner of free speech. Of course it should, it's drawing but it is so fucking creepy you creepy motherfuckers. Something is deeply, deeply wrong with you. If there were some way to humanely put you all out of your fucked up misery so we could get back to defending fucked up art like Naked Lunch or De Sade instead of ten thousand versions of the same story with no other purpose than for your basement dwelling ass to live out your anger at being a motherfucking underdeveloped, broken troglodyte, I'd encourage you to take it immediately. You've taken free speech as an excuse not to push the boundaries of the mind and society but instead to shit all over your own brains.
Fuck you.
A Saudi judge said it is okay for a man to slap his wife for lavish spending at a seminar on domestic violence, according to a report from Agence France-Presse.
Jeddah judge Hamad al-Razine told the group a husband was justified in smacking his wife, using overspending on a high-end abaya, the black shroud Saudi women must wear in public, as an example, according to AFP.
"If a person gives 1,200 riyals (320 dollars) to his wife and she spends 900 riyals (240 dollars) to purchase an abaya from a brand shop, and if her husband slaps her on the face as a reaction to her action, she deserves that punishment," Razine said, AFP reported.
The seminar was on the role of authorities in preventing domestic violence that was attended by activists and officials, including members of the National Family Safety Program.
While the judge recognized the country's domestic violence problem, he said some of the blame must lie with the wives.
"Nobody puts even a fraction of the blame on them," Razine said, AFP reported.
Another Wolf In Sheeps Clothing
Fri Jun 05 17:08:38 BST 2009 by Dewey
Obama is just another in a long line of POLITICIANS that live by Half Truths... If Obama was the Real Deal and REALLY cared about Health Care, He would put a moratorium on The Fluoridation of America's Drinking water IMMEDIATELY!
He Knows Fluoride is a Deadly Neurotoxin and yet Says NOTHING! It's all about the MONEY... Pay Him or anyone enough money and you will NEVER hear the work FLUORIDE come out of their mouth...
Even Though I Did Bote for Mr. Obama, He Will NEVER be My President until he Addresses the Issue Of Fluoride...
But Don't look for that to Happen EVER!
9,975 of 10,059 people found the following review helpful:
5.0 out of 5 stars Dual Function Design, November 10, 2008
By B. Govern "Bee-Dot-Govern" (New Jersey, USA) - See all my reviews
(REAL NAME)
This item has wolves on it which makes it intrinsically sweet and worth 5 stars by itself, but once I tried it on, that's when the magic happened. After checking to ensure that the shirt would properly cover my girth, I walked from my trailer to Wal-mart with the shirt on and was immediately approached by women. The women knew from the wolves on my shirt that I, like a wolf, am a mysterious loner who knows how to 'howl at the moon' from time to time (if you catch my drift!). The women that approached me wanted to know if I would be their boyfriend and/or give them money for something they called mehth. I told them no, because they didn't have enough teeth, and frankly a man with a wolf-shirt shouldn't settle for the first thing that comes to him.
I arrived at Wal-mart, mounted my courtesy-scooter (walking is such a drag!) sitting side saddle so that my wolves would show. While I was browsing tube socks, I could hear aroused asthmatic breathing behind me. I turned around to see a slightly sweaty dream in sweatpants and flip-flops standing there. She told me she liked the wolves on my shirt, I told her I wanted to howl at her moon. She offered me a swig from her mountain dew, and I drove my scooter, with her shuffling along side out the door and into the rest of our lives. Thank you wolf shirt.
Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.
Darwin Or Divine Justice??
Mon Jun 22 21:42:10 BST 2009 by Jose Nose
A twist to darwin theory says that stupid people cut themselves out from the gene pool cause they die younger. Guess that this apply here
Divine Justice: Freaking woman decided she knew better than the doctors. Well, that is questionable. I guess you have the right to not believe those healthy-people-killers. But then you have to carry the consequences of such decision and be sure not to force belief on someone else. In this case she went rampant: Decided HIV did not cause AIDS, decided the doctors where conspirators, denied evidence, denied DEATH, and refuse to change her mind.
AND SHE FORCE her daughter into the same suckerness. You can choose your destiny, but you can not choose someone else, even when it is your child (that is not, that is just a trick of words, but humans can not be property or it is slavery)
So basically she expose her daughter to a deadly disease, and the law allowed it!!!. Now nature followed her course, blind to juman suckerners and the daughter falls ills and DIES.
That is CRIMINAL NEGLIGENCE and the perpetrator has to be brough to justice. Again, LAW did not not act but nature did. She falls ill and dies same exact sucky death as she irresponsibly inflicted on someone else. I do not believe in god, but I see DIVINE JUSTICE here!
So behold the truth cause life HATES stupidicy/ignorance!. Life DEMANDS Education I guess!
Bad journalism??? what,,some people on the coments are saying this was bad journalism because the journalist did not talk to any of the deniers. Of course s/he did not CAUSE THEY ARE DEATH!. Well maybe there are not death YET, but they amy soon be
SAFE SEX: If you want safe sex, then go to your bank, ask them to open the SAFE, close yourself into and proceed accordingly. That is the only true and literal SAFE SEX that you are ever gonna get in this life (except SELF-SEX, I guess)
Also, some people goes all around demanding evidence and proper scientific method and bla bla. I do believe in those. I also believe that when bodies star piling up then we are not dealing with life but with DEATH. And that just tell me the rules are different. As much as I care, we see people dying, we find a probable cause, we act based on that and people stop dying, then that is all I care about. Everyone else that tries to change/challengue the finding is risking people lives. I would like to propose the rule that in this cases, the challenguer proves his worthiness and belief by taking the same risk himself/herself as the risk he is trying to put others into
In this case, it will mean to take those AIDS denialist and infect them with AIDS and see if the use any of those banana-rama-egg concontions that the ex-president of South Africa was so fond about (but he did not have AIDS).
Anything else is pure bla bla.
Beliefs, thinking, rethinking, principles, rights, freedom, etc, have their duly place, but when people star dying is time to set them aside and ACT and DEMAND accountability. Not everyone can have a saying
Saying that, maybe we should force BIG TOBACCO CEOs to smoke 3 packs a day. Lets see what they say then about 'tobacco is safe'. haaa!
u stupid bitch crack head mother fucking haters dont deport back immigransts u ass holes kuz wat did they do 2 u hoes? yes im 13 but so wat u fukking racist mother fuckers leave immigrants alone ,itz ur stupid fault whites wich led 2 9/11 just by being racist!!! itz sad wat happened in 911 but y r u fighting against mexicans or immigrants?? leave us alone bitch..and yes im mexican and im 13!! but that doesnt give u he right to hate !!!!!!!
I don't know who this guy is, did a quick search and I got José José who is apparently an entertainer. (guessing that's not right)LOL!! No, this was on NewScientist or LiveScience (can't remember which) in the comments section. Probably the first fake name that popped into his head. You don't have to be registered to comment.
But I have honestly never read anything more illiterate and more ridiculous. I realise he has no knowledge of ....well, anything. But not even his logic is sound! He sounds like a jabbering wreck. I'm not even 100% sure what his point is, he just seems to have ranted on about giving people aids. I love ( and by love I mean hate) when people try to site Darwin to 'prove their fairies'.Heh. You should browse Comments Sections whenever you find them. Just... Wow.
Um, you do know that AIDS comes from having HIV, the Homosexual Immunodeficiency Virus, right?
The first person to get HIV was a man that had anal sex with a male monkey in Africa. He then gave it to his wife, who then gave it to 10% of Africa, because she was a slut. And her name was Hillary Clinton.
Those 10% went on to infect 100% of the people infected with HIV and AIDS today.
That HAS to be sarcasm. Where did you get that?
This is a good ship but... So many weaknesses anyway.
Why can't we get some more information on more high tech stuff going on?
For example it's pretty weird to not believe a flying disc (ufo) is real when magnets do exist.
Why not put more research into flying + magnetism and magnetism + dark matter..
If humans can make stuff, they could also probably make a ufo shaped with it's own energy source ( being magnetism) Mixed with all the other factors u would get a kind of shipment, shouldent be so hard really.
this magnet technology is something we seriously should focus on.. I mean all our old scripts got picture of a flying disc etc... So my guess is that we know about the magnet technology, but we fail to use it? With todays computer technology it's actually doable to fly around with the ufo's.
Might also be that the magnets on this world was alot stronger and more kind of a energy source for humans then it is today. Or maybe we are just ignoring it...
But im against all this fuel burning away etc, there must find billions of other ways if people just start to use some of theyr intellect on a smart encounter rather then something that is interesting and will take years to stabilize.
Rather do some more research on what options there is to travel in space and tell me how my magnet ufo thingy will work with the dark matter. Gotta have some high tech computers to calculate how to travel the safest route to andromeda galaxy etc, universe gps for everyone..
Guess we are getting closer, not proud of the human way at all..
Count me in for a space ride when they release some kind of magnet ufo, i really don't see any safer way to play with nature
Madlander... you are obviously either a complete fool, or care absolutely nothing about the "fairer sex". If you WERE a man, you would understand that your partner needs to be satisfied also, and the easiest and most pleasant way to achieve this is to find and stimulate the G-spot. Since you don't have any sort of a clue, perhaps you should stay with the sheep. At least, they won't tell your husband you are a jerk.
I know this is a predominantly Christian forum, and I know that many people don't share my views on sexuality within marriage, but bear with me for a moment.... About two years ago, my wife (a Catholic) and I had a pretty bland sex life. We'd tried toys, erotic movies, the whole lot, and while our sex wasn't terrible, it lacked the enthusiasm of our first few years of marriage.
Anyway, after a particularly raucous grill-off with some long time friends, my stomach was shot. The next day, I went to answer nature's call and happened to leave the bathroom door open while I was 'laying down some chunnel work,' and my wife walked by. I heard her pause, take a few heady whiffs of my bold, escaping inner atmosphere, and before I knew it she was straddling me! Apparently the odor set her off, but for me, it was the act of both penetrating and evacuating, or, at the moment of my eventual (and very satisfying!) ejaculation, evacuating and filling.... Ever since, it's been a weekly ritual for her to 'pretend' to walk in on me and spend the next few hours being spun around like a fecal desiring top Hopefully this answers your question, and again, I totally understand if your religion makes this an impossibility - just don't dismiss it out of hand.
First off, just let me say I work my darn rear end off on the phones supporting net service tech customers to save up for Outback Night. It's something me and Mother have enjoyed together for years now. If I take a woman out to The OSH I go in assuming it's accepted that there is an expected protocol for a female accompaniment to an establishment such as Outback. A half eaten strang bean dish with special fried crispers added to the fun mix smoldered like disrespectful embers before my face for a good 20 minutes before we were served our entree. I sat seething. My bowl of Walkabout Soup® of the Day served as empty solace! An act tantamount to razing a people's crops only with more impudence. Images of Dachau flashed in my mind as she incessantly babbled on of a nursing degree. 'Aussie-Tizers to Share' do not grow on trees, and I could have won an Ebay auction for a hella sick + rare Transformer earlier that week so obviously on edge as it was. After consummation of the sex act later that night she had the gall to call me back to bed to "cuddle" as I got up to bleach and air dry the sheets. Let's writhe together in our own fluids and filth like a giant strand of 1000x slugs (one big rear end strand of intermixing intertwined slugs in a bed) in cum. That's Sexy. Having second thoughts about attending Mass with her this Sunday. How do I let her know?
So I was pooping today and I had something red in my poop that had me a little worried. I didn't know if it was blood or something I ate, like red peppers or tomatoes. I asked my girlfriend to look at because I wanted a second opinion and she flat out said no, and she was serious.
Now, whatever, maybe she doesn't want to. But, she plans on going to nursing school and I am sure she will see stuff much worse in addition to cleaning poop off the elderly and what not.
It bothers me that she does not care about my well-being enough to at least check it out. Maybe it is a trust thing. I want to marry her, but how can I spend the rest of my life with someone who is afraid of my poop? Not to mention taking care of a baby...
Come to think of it I've never really had an intelligent conversation with someone... relationships just aren't my thing (21 years and I've only been on one date which was a sympathy date from a lesbian). And as far as friendships go I usually only talk about Videogames and Rock Music.
QuoteDid you ever wonder why after each victory of John McCain in the primaries the media serves the same images of a few dozen people "cheering"?Every time I see something online that just boggles the mind in its stupidity, I'm posting it here. Feel free to do the same.
The answer: McCain is supported by as many people as George W. Bush, i.e. 1 pct of the population. He did not manage to ever break the 1,000 barrier for an audience, including the large share of paid campaign personnel.
Why did the Illuminati stage the 2008 US elections as John McCain losing to Hillary Clinton, supported by less than 5 pct of the population, after staging the "close as it can get" victory of Clinton against the "hope of change for America", supported by 80 pct of the "voters", "black" "ex-Muslim" Obama (1)?
Why did the Illuminati openly tell the sheep in 2006 some of the truth about 9/11, e.g. that the WTC towers were demolished? (2)
Answer: Illuminati Religion B-Plan and the ultimate border
The start point to answer both questions is one and the same.
The main objective of having 1 pct McCain as the candidate losing to 5 pct Clinton is not to cover-up the fact that the Bush administration is supported by less than 1 pct of the population.
It is to prove the Illuminati Religion B-Plan to be correct, i.e. that the Illuminati can reach perfection, which means total deception and total control of the sheep.
The ultimate border for total control is defined by the Illuminati telling to the sheep all the basics about how completely they were fooled.
In other words, telling to the sheep EXACTLY what Matt Marriott explained to them during the last 10 years. (3)
Reductionism again and again
The BIG LIE Technique becomes redundant (4), after the formal acceptance of the "human cattle" to carry the mark on their forehead and on their right hand, i.e. in thoughts and deeds, in 2004.
The Reduction of the BIG LIE Technique: End Times Reductionism again and again. (5)
Notes
(1) Obama now on 10 victories in a row.... before he will be repeating the New York and California script in Texas and Ohio, i.e. asking for applause for Clinton's voting machines and her next "victories".
Don't blame Obama's Muslim grandmother, digging for potable water from a hole in the ground each day, for his "defeat", where "each vote counts". After all she did not cast her vote into the voting machines...
T-Shirt review on Amazon.com. The shirt has 3 wolves howling at the moon on the front.
The Male:
When a male dolphin is interested in you, about the only thing you can do, if you are male, is to masturbate him. (Unfortunately, I cannot speak for the female of the human species... it seems women just don't like dolphins enough... so I cannot say for sure if it is safe to mate with them. I would suspect not, due to a dolphins size, but then again, I cannot say for a woman.) WARNING! In the considerations of safety, you should NEVER let a male dolphin attempt anal sex with you. The Bottle-nose dolphin member is around 12 inches, very muscular, and the thrusting and the force of ejaculation (A male can come as far as 14 feet) would cause serious internal injuries, resulting in peritonitus and possible death. Unless you are the masochistic type, you will have a hard time explaining your predicament to the doctors in the emergency ward....
A male dolphin's member is roughly S-shaped, tapered at the end. If you are in the water with them, it is best to support the dolphin on his side, just under the water, with one hand, and handle him with the other. Male dolphins, I find, tend to prefer the base of the penis to be gently massaged and squeezed, as well as gently rubbed along it's length. It feels very much like the rest of the dolphin (ie. smooth and rubbery to the touch, but firmer). It doesn't take long for the male to ejaculate, around 40 seconds to a minute, and this is usually accompanied by either shuddering just prior to ejaculating, and thrusting and tail-arching during ejaculation. The force of ejaculation can be powerful at times, so it is best to keep your face out of the line of fire, or keep his member underwater. You can attempt to lick and suck on the end of it while masturbating as well, but be warned, do not try to give full throat, and get the hell out of the way before he ejaculates! A male dolphin could snap your neck in an accidental thrust, and that would be the end of that relationship.
The Female:
Well, the females are again a little trickier. There are two courses of action with a female fin: Masturbation, or mating.
Masturbation: Female dolphins, once they show interest in you, can be supported in much the same way as the male, one hand under the fin, supporting her, the other doing the stimulating. The clitoris of the female is located at the top of the genital slit, and is a prominent lump when erect. You can rub this with your finger tips, or lick and suck it, but with the oral aspect, you might end up with a bruised nose as they thrust up into you. You can slide your hand gently into their genital opening, and feel around inside, rubbing gently. They feel warm and muscular inside, their labia like tough, squishy sponge when they are excited. Don't be surprised if they start to play with your hand inside them. They have very manipulative muscles, and can use them to carry and manipulate objects, including your hand. (They can do things that would make a regular human woman turn green with envy.) Their climax is coupled with stiffening, shuddering, sometimes a lot of thrusting, clinching of the vaginal muscles, and sometimes vocalisation.
Mating: This is harder. Obviously, being human, it is awkward, but not impossible to mate in open water. It is easier to have the dolphin in a shallow area (like the shallows just off the beach) around 1 1/2 to 2 feet deep. This is usually comfortable enough for both the dolphin and you. Gently, you should roll the dolphin on her side, so she is lying belly-towards you. You can prop yourself up on an elbow, and lie belly to belly against her. You may want to use the other arm to gently hold her close, and place the tip of your member against her genital slit. She will, if interested, arch her body up against you, taking you inside her body. There is usually a fair bit of wriggling and shifting, usually to get comfortable, both outside and inside. Once comfortable, though, females initiate a series of muscular vaginal contractions that rub the entire length of your member. They may also thrust rhythmically against you, so enjoy the experience while you can, since you will rarely last longer that a minute or two. Just prior to her climaxing, she will up the speed of her contractions and thrusts. It is interesting to note that the times I have mated with females, thay have timed their orgasm to mine. Whether they do this consciously or not, I do not know, but it is a great feeling to have two bodies shuddering against each other at the one time.
One thing to note. Whether you masturbate or mate a fin, male or female, always spend time with them afterwards. Cuddle them, rub them, talk to them and most importantly, and show them you love them. This is essential, as it helps to strengthen the bond between you. Like a way of saying that this wasn't just a one night fling. The dolphins appreciate it, and they will want your company more the next time you visit them.
tl; dr.
xolik, you're finds are always really good but really long. *humph*
It also seems helpful to point out that everyone is born an atheist.
Babies are infamous for being terrible philosophers.
"I was in the locker room and several other boys were getting undressed to shower. I'm not gay but my dick was under a confundus charm.
No it means that Mommy is a huge slut. If a kid sneaks out at night and his dad is dressed as Santa, you have to think: The only reason why Dad would dress as Santa is to put on an act for the kids and/or to do some costume play with Mom.
However, the kid in the song is fast asleep, and only concerned when he snuck down the stairs about his mom seeing him. If he did think that his dad was in another room, he should have mentioned it. Then, the kid laments the fact that his dad wasn't there to see Santa. Dad wasn't in the house.
Also, the kid didn't get caught, nor encounter Santa later on. If the father was indeed wearing a costume for the purpose of pretending to be Santa for the kids, then the kid would have encountered Santa before or after seeing his mom kiss him.
Secondly, if costume play was the explanation, then only lovely parents would dress as Santa and not play Santa for the kids before or after the sexual festivities. The kid tells the story about this happening "last night" so this was likely his lone encounter with Santa.
Also, mistletoe kisses and a flirtatious tickling of the beard does not play well into the image of two parents. Not in the open living room if they weren't planning on also surprising the kids. It's possible, but just another element in making the Santa = Dad explanation unlikely.
Furthermore, kids, even very young kids, have a sense of the fidelity of their parents. If a kid crept down the steps, saw Santa kissing his mom, and then thought "Haha, it would be hilarious if dad saw this poo poo." Then that's not an appropriate reaction unless he already knows that his mom is a dirty slut, and Santa is just one in a long line of fuckbuddies.
The kid also doesn't care about his father's feelings. The father could be dead, sure, and this could make his mom's behavior acceptable, but the kid's description indicates either that Daddy is still alive, or that the kid is a psychopath regarding his father's death. Therefore, the kid understands that his father is gone, is not jaded by his mom loving around, but, quite importantly, treats it as a possibility that his dad could have seen this kissing take place. In other words, his dad wasn't there, but did live there.
There was a reason why this Santa didn't purposely have an encounter with the kids. He wasn't the dad, and he was there to see mom for a booty call while daddy was away.
QED. Mom was a cheating whore.
there isn't anyone on earth who doesn't already know that it is at least partially a holy war being waged
against two antagonistic religions. There isn't anyone on earth who doesn't at least secretly understand
that neither Islam nor Christianity tolerate one another beyond worthless lip service.
Good Christians should hate Muslims.
Good Muslims should hate Christians.
Life would be better off if every single church and mosque was bulldozed and replaced by Arby's.
I take issue with the Arby's part. Del Taco is superior.
I take issue with the Arby's part. Del Taco is superior.
QFT
Would like to see a Five-Guys open near me, though.
Tech Support: 'I need you to right-click on the Open Desktop.'
Customer: 'OK.'
Tech Support: 'Did you get a pop-up menu?'
Customer: 'No.'
Tech Support: 'OK . Right-Click again. Do you see a pop-up menu?'
Customer: 'No.'
Tech Support: 'OK, sir.. Can you tell me what you have done up until this point?' Customer: 'Sure. You told me to write 'click' and I wrote 'click'.'
I'm sure Ive heard that before.
Being queer is kinda like being a vampire. We are all descended from the original Fruitcake of Prancing Darkness. There are the pureblooded noble houses (gays and lesbians), and then there are the daywalkers (filthy halfbreeds/bisexuals). Every so often we will turn another to our side and our ranks swell with fauxhawks, lipgloss, wild orgies and the most fierce struts you've ever seen. I've seen a lipstick and a flamer Z-snapping at each other, hands a blur and eyes blazing as they bitch the other out for spilling their apple-tini on the other's purse. I've seen a butchdyke shoulder checking a bear-daddy during a pickup game of rugby. The things I've seen...
You're probably asking yourself where transpeople fit into this. They are the lycans, of course. Every few weeks they can no longer withhold their natures and with exultant, soul-ripping screams of raw, animal release they shed their skins and assume their true forms. They grow long nails (some of them) and the others grow hair.
For too long the vampires and the lycans have warred against one another. I hope in my lifetime to see an alliance between our noble races as we seek to overcome the petty humans. Once we have taken over their magical ritual of marriage we will be able to summon La Fagra--the embodiment of pure homosexuality, a twisting, writhing torrent of pure Queer that will turn everyone instantly into one of us.
I eagerly await the day.
Every time I see over 40 new posts in this thread, I know there's a stupid derail going on. Before I clicked I thought to myself: 'this is probably going to be about atheism or ranch dressing.'
Man's first instinct is to create a completely new identity for himself. Ex. "I will be a ___________ when I grow up."
We act like a thing and become a thing. Just as cells act like they make up our bodies. So they do!
All things exist as one specific thing which needs other specific things to survive. You know this i'm sure, sorry for the boring intro, long story short when we were earlier on in our progression of learning how to exist within this world our creator shaped our thinking and I think He took His time with this one. So long story short He couldn't make man believe immediately or the creator Himself would never know the in-depth process of how it must feel within short time space and long time-space.
For this purpose man couldn't believe in a God straight out, but they thought the tasks at hand seem a bit to daunting for just one creator to handle so within them they devised a way of explaining the different parts of the whole of creation. This transposed and with disbelief and some time these separate entities of God are now within and of themselves being Man's design which can only acknowledge that which is within upon his own means. But when said man acquires outside knowledge through outside means, it is not of His own design that he should claim said belief.
So in the end all streams flow from one main stream, one great being, one actuality within and without of our small realities. Our semi-realities make up not one trillionth of His all consuming might and presence within every fiber of our being, physical, literal, and imaginative.
So we evolved to understand this truth about the creator while others stayed behind to study man's design. and ponder upon the differences instead of realizing the wholeness one truly exists.
Speaking of atheism, this is from an actual discussion I've been having online with a long-lost cousin of mine (he happens to be a God freak):
I can't make any sense out of that whatsoever.
Speaking of atheism, this is from an actual discussion I've been having online with a long-lost cousin of mine (he happens to be a God freak):
I can't make any sense out of that whatsoever.
In a nutshell: ...I only read all of this because you wrote it.
I only read all of this because you wrote it.
Now, I have one question.
lolwut?
Oops, looks like Novice got in before me, but here goes anyway:
I bet your cousin would argue that it's you who is actually lost.
In a nutshell: God deliberately created man a heathen so that man could naturally acquire enlightenment, rather than be force-fed The Truth. This way, by observing man's learning process, God would gain understanding of what it is like to be a mortal. So, man's path to enlightenment evolved from pan-deism and atheism to, finally, The Truth. However, this does not mean that God is somehow "created" in man's mind, because the knowledge of God came from God, and was merely found by man. We know this because EVERYTHING comes from God, because God is everything. Us atheists are unenlightened throwbacks, and true believers like your cousin are intellectually evolved. In between us throwbacks and your enlightened cousin are a bunch of people preoccupied with studying religion (i.e., man's imperfect version of The Truth), instead of just knowing The Truth. In other words, philosophers are no more enlightened than heathens.
I don't know how your cousin squares this with a literal interpretation of the Bible, where, you might remember, God pretty much bludgeons Adam, Eve, and various ensuing Israelites with The Truth.
By the way, is this the cousin that knows Danny Trejo?
The cousin of mine that knows Danny Trejo is this one (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm2985000/).
Oops, looks like Novice got in before me, but here goes anyway:
I don't know how your cousin squares this with a literal interpretation of the Bible, where, you might remember, God pretty much bludgeons Adam, Eve, and various ensuing Israelites with The Truth.
Why didn't he just SAY that?
These are gay solders (why do you think he's trying to get rid of,'Don't Ask, Don't Tell?' Recruitment that's why!) who have been trained at FEMA death camps to be fanatically loyal to Obama and his Muslim Communist agenda. There not going to secure the borders it's just a cover. There actually going down there to welcome their illegal brethern and help get them inside the country.
Many of them will actually be from the Kenyan army, where Obama is secretly emperor, and there going to go all across the country raping white women until there are no whites left. Then when everyone is coloured Obama knows he can make himself president for life. That's stage one.
Let's say you're on a boat. It's a cheap little powered speedboat, and you're drifting somewhat aimlessly with your dog in the middle of a pristine lake in Northern Ontario (for whatever reason). The sun is starting to set, and you're working through a case of beer slowly while absently casting lines. The sun is reflecting off the water beautifully, the mosquito are hours from coming out, and you've got a cheap little radio playing 80s country-rock in the background. Just a general Podunk good time.
After some time on the lake passes, you notice that your boat has been drifting closer to a houseboat with a small family aboard, having a few drinks of their own, barbecuing and just generally doing boat stuff. Your dog barks, and the passengers absently look off into your direction - one of them even waves to you, and you wave back.
Around this point, your long-ignored bladder steals your attention - you need to piss. Do you
(a) Face away from the houseboat, and pee into the lake
(b) Face away from the houseboat, and fill up an empty bottle,
(c) Lay as flat as you possibly can across the benches of your boat, grab your dick, and just star pissing all over yourself, creating massive arcs above you, letting your piss fall all over you, allowing your piss to collect in your clothes, in your fishing gear, in your dog's fur, in your fucking face, and at last pooling in the the boat under you, ending the display by smiling at the houseboat, waving, and then cast another line.
Sub-poll: If your answer is (c), please explain how you fucking came to that decision, because that fuck didn't explain shit.
Wow Jkope best I remeber reading experts built the Titanic and a Amature built the Ark, Fisrt if you dont know nothing about pipe fitting dont critize any one who does the Idea of a valve would had been great , it would work! if not for what was comming out would be Hazard to try and weld for the valve would prevent blow back and that is a problem they now have I am sure but the valve in place and a little of you'll BS should seal it up pretty good by applying the BS to the outer ring that is leaking and allowining the oil releasing to create a suction that would pull your BS tight and seal it off when the seal is pretty well shut turn the valve off bS IS CAN BE A PLASTIC NONE DEGRADABLE BY A DEMOCRATE OR PETROLEM BASE SUBSTANCE.
A PLASTIC NONE DEGRADABLE BY A DEMOCRATEHECTAR!
Ronnie 33 minutes ago Report Abuse
yaw are a bunch of dummy's and think you now it all. got. a leek just plug it. you dame basters and quit trying to retrieve it plug the leek ,mud is not the way how a bought a are bag for big truck made extra strong and filed with cement to the walls of the pipe look i dont care just put a stopper in it it is that simple..
today i worked up the courage to actually speak to josie in aisle 3
she kept saying things like, "did you find everything you needed sweetie?" and "here's your receipt, thanks hon!" i just smiled shyly and muttered thanks before i turned away. oh, why do i have to be so shy?
but her words played over and ever in my head. there's no way she'd say them to everyday average people; that would be too unprofessional. no, she was totally hitting on me! why else would she call me those endearing names?
well, i waited across the street from the parking lot after the store closed, and through the branches of the tree i saw her--the glorious woman that loved me but couldn't say so while on the job.
i saw her get into a 2001 blue taurus and head off to the west side of town. i followed as far as i could, but then i saw her turn left on aspen street. the next night, i waited down aspen street, and sure enough saw her blue taurus drive down. this time i was ready with my bike, so i followed her back to an average looking duplex on the corner of aspen and 32nd. this was not the cozy cottage i was envisioning for this majestic goddess of the Blue Vest.
when she went inside and turned on the lights, i crept to the side window where one blind was askew and afforded a partial view of the interior. i stared lovingly at what surely would be my future wife as she idly watched TV and drank a diet pepsi. i made a mental note that i should be seen by her drinking diet pepsi as well.
after about three hours, she got up to go to bed. since i'm a gentleman, i didn't look through her bedroom window, but instead went home thinking of all the things i'd say to her the next day! i'd ask her if she saw iron chef last night, knowing full well she did. oh, and i'd also be holding some diet pepsi.
so i went back the next day and i had a 2-liter bottle of diet pepsi in my basket along with the iron chef nintendo DS game (i figured it made for a better segue into her TV watching habits). there was another guy in line before me, and i was daydreaming about the secret passion between me and josie.
until i heard her speak the following words: "did you find everything you needed, sweetie?"
oh, how my mind raced! what did she mean by that?
was she cheating on me with this large, obviously uneducated jerk?
was she testing me?
was she actually talking to me?
yes, that had to be it! ha, oh how silly i felt when the flash of jealous anger reared, but thankfully cooler heads prevail.
i said, "yes, i got everything i needed, thanks!". that was four more words than i'd ever spoken to anyone in public, and i was feeling flushed.
josie turned her head and simply looked at me. then the man in front of me turned around with a quizzical look and said, "the fuck's your problem? you a retard or something?" then he laughed at his own hateful humor.
instantly my worldview cracked, but it was shattered when i heard a brief giggle emanate from josie's luscious lips. oh why, josie?
everything swam in and out of focus as i furiously blinked away tears of shame and humiliation. my hands let go of the basket of their own accord, and i found myself running out of the store. the last thing i heard was the sound of that....that brute's laughter and josie's chirping. of course she loved him; i should have known from the start that it was never meant to be.
i ran all the way home, burst into my bedroom and buried my face into my squirtle pillow and screamed out all of my anguish and pain. i hadn't been this consumed with grief since princess sally was killed in issue #47 of sonic the hedgehog. fortunately, i was able to reconcile my anguish back then by creating a website proclaiming my love for her. but that was back when i was 20. this time was different.
this was real life.
this is now the eleventh store i can never set foot into ever again. at least this time it's not because of those nazis at gamestop hustling me out for loitering. this time it was for love.
I recently read There is a Monster at the End of This Book by Grover.
I picked it up on a lark, figuring it would by a typical horror/thriller throwaway.
It followed a pretty obvious course through the old cliches of the genre most of the way through, but the ending threw me for a shock that had me catatonic in existential malaise for weeks afterwards.
NOTE: DO NOT READ FURTHER IF YOU DO NOT WANT IT TO BE SPOILED!!!
When I found out that the monster in the book was indeed Grover I thought, "My god... it could be any of us."
Yes that's right, the narrator of the book, the kindly and gentle guide through this thrill-ride, was indeed the monster of which he spoke.
This raised many, many questions. It seems from reflection that Grover himself was unaware that he was the monster.
However, in the modern and postmodern likelihood of unreliable narration, it seems that it could just of easily been a clever deception by the monster, to lure the reader into his confidence before springing his trap.
But the question remains. Does a monster know he is a monster? Or does his twisted logic somehow rationalize his monstrosity and allow it run rampant?
Also, if this physically harmless appearance could harbor the monster of the book, doesn't that mean that anyone could be a monster? That "evil has no face" as they say?
Ultimately, it brought me to reflect that one may be a monster and not even be full conscious of the fact. That one may be revealed to be monstrous, but only at the end of a mysterious and terrible life of lies.