Topic: Muffins (Read 5541 times)

Probie · « **on:** March 26, 2009, 08:45:06 AM »

I'm going to make muffins tonight for my friends birthday. I could go for the obvious blueberry, but i was wondering if anyone had any special recipes or advice or they could think of something a bit special to put in them....

ivan · « **Reply #1 on:** March 26, 2009, 10:16:57 AM »

Quote from: Probie on March 26, 2009, 08:45:06 AM

I'm going to make muffins tonight for my friends birthday. I could go for the obvious blueberry, but i was wondering if anyone had any special recipes or advice or they could think of something a bit special to put in them....

Something a bit special to put in them? How about some corned beef hash?

Also, I read that as "I could go for the obvious blubbery" and thought, you know, like "ew".

P.S.: I don't like muffins. I know I am in a tiny minority, but it is a non-volitional repulsion to the concept of a muffin, and to the very word.

ivan · « **Reply #2 on:** March 26, 2009, 10:24:32 AM »

The muffin man is seated at the table in the laboratory of the Utility Muffin Research kitchen. Reaching for an oversized chrome spoon, he gathers an intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants and, brushing his scapular aside, proceeds to dump these inside of his shirt.

He turns to us and speaks:

"Some people like cupcakes better. I, for one, care less for them!"

Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully charged icing anointment utensil, he puts forth a quarter-ounce green rosette near the summit of a dense but radiant muffin of his own design.

Later, he says:

"Some people like cupcakes exclusively, while myself, I say, there is naught, nor ought there be nothing so exalted on the face of God's great Earth as that prince of foods... The Muffin!"

Girl, you thought he was a man,
But he was a muffin.
He hung around till you found
That he didn't know nuthin'.

Girl, you thought he was a man,
But he only was a-puffin.
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin.

Bruce Fowler on trombone, Napoleon Murphy Brock on tenor sax and lead vocals, Terry Bozzio on drums, Tom Fowler on bass, Denny Walley on slide, George Duke on keyboards, Captain Beefheart on vocals and soprano sax, and madness. Thank you very much for coming to the concert tonight. Hope you enjoyed it. Goodnight Austin, Texas, wherever you are!

Probie · « **Reply #3 on:** March 26, 2009, 10:45:58 AM »

Quote from: ivan on March 26, 2009, 10:16:57 AM

Something a bit special to put in them? How about some corned beef hash?

Also, I read that as "I could go for the obvious blubbery" and thought, you know, like "ew".

P.S.: I don't like muffins. I know I am in a tiny minority, but it is a non-volitional repulsion to the concept of a muffin, and to the very word.

Curious, I'm replused by corned beef hash, and replused by the word blubbery. Muffins however, I love...nom nom nom.

ivan · « **Reply #4 on:** March 26, 2009, 10:50:49 AM »

I don't believe you when you say you're repulsed by corned beef hash. I think you're just saying that to get back at me for saying I hate muffins.

ivan · « **Reply #5 on:** March 26, 2009, 10:52:35 AM »

By the way, if -- I say IF I were to eat a muffin, I would prefer one with either dried cranberries or currants. Also, if it is too dry, I will throw it at you.

Probie · « **Reply #6 on:** March 26, 2009, 11:05:47 AM »

Unfortunately there is no way I can prove this. However, I doesn't really matter.

Strange though, how I love potato's and like corned beef on a sandwhich, but when put together it makes me sick. Maybe it was being force fed it in junior school with baked beans, or maybe it's because it has the consistency of paste. But I don't need to get back at you for not eating muffins, the less muffins you eat the more there are in the world for me. yum yum.

CBH FTL

ivan · « **Reply #7 on:** March 26, 2009, 11:17:22 AM »

As much as I might enjoy a good plate of CBH, I would never claim that it is Faster Than Light. Furthermore, serving CBH with baked beans ought to be a punishable offense. And finally, if you had something that had the consistency of paste, then I promise you it was not proper CBH, but an abomination. You poor thing.

Probie · « **Reply #8 on:** March 26, 2009, 11:22:43 AM »

Not really poor, I assure you my experience with food has been very rich. I doubt I have missed much and feel no longing for a better experience.

ivan · « **Reply #9 on:** March 26, 2009, 11:46:10 AM »

In other words, your mind is closed.

And here I was, offering the olive-branch of muffin-tasting, despite my own personal aversion to the very concept of this effete, oh-so-precious little piece of anti-cuisine fluffery. I withdraw my currant/dried cranberry suggestion.

However, I still have it in my heart to make you this offer: if you consider -- mind you, merely consider! -- the idea of a brisket of beef corned personally by me and simmered lovingly in ale, shredded into bits and added to several Yukon Gold potatos that had been diced and fried, along with chopped onion, in butter until tender, allowed to sizzle merrily until it all forms a caramelized crust, seasoned properly along the way with sea salt and fresh-ground pepper, and finally served with a poached egg nestled atop... If you cannot overcome your pride to concede the possibility -- just the possibility -- that you would find this dish enjoyable, then I have nothing more to say to you on the subject of cookery, and release you to your miserly, grey, pitiable world of hamburgers and chicken kebobs.

Well?

ivan · « **Reply #10 on:** March 26, 2009, 11:47:21 AM »

By the way, you ever watch Jamie At Home?

Scheherazade · « **Reply #11 on:** March 26, 2009, 11:49:53 AM »

Quote from: ivan on March 26, 2009, 11:46:10 AM

In other words, your mind is closed.

And here I was, offering the olive-branch of muffin-tasting, despite my own personal aversion to the very concept of this effete, oh-so-precious little piece of anti-cuisine fluffery. I withdraw my currant/dried cranberry suggestion.

However, I still have it in my heart to make you this offer: if you consider -- mind you, merely consider! -- the idea of a brisket of beef corned personally by me and simmered lovingly in ale, shredded into bits and added to several Yukon Gold potatos that had been diced and fried, along with chopped onion, in butter until tender, allowed to sizzle merrily until it all forms a caramelized crust, seasoned properly along the way with sea salt and fresh-ground pepper, and finally served with a poached egg nestled atop... If you cannot overcome your pride to concede the possibility -- just the possibility -- that you would find this dish enjoyable, then I have nothing more to say to you on the subject of cookery, and release you to your miserly, grey, pitiable world of hamburgers and chicken kebobs.

Well?

Is it wrong that I'm turned on?

Also, Dan Quail would be disappointed.

ivan · « **Reply #12 on:** March 26, 2009, 11:52:01 AM »

Damn. I can't spell and cook at the same time.

Probie · « **Reply #13 on:** March 26, 2009, 11:55:18 AM »

I sense we have been in this situation before and we shall be again. Our dynamic is rather like that of the cylons. *facepalm*

what you just discribed is not corned beef hash. THIS:

is corned beef hash. What you discribed would be delicious. And don't you bring my pride into this. *blushed* Seriously I feel like you are trying to drive me insane.

P.S Are you asking me out rofl?

Probie · « **Reply #14 on:** March 26, 2009, 11:56:13 AM »

and yes, I watch jamie quite a bit. I would let him feed me corned beef hash

ivan · « **Reply #15 on:** March 26, 2009, 12:09:02 PM »

Quote from: Probie on March 26, 2009, 11:55:18 AM

P.S Are you asking me out rofl?

No. Offering to cook a plate of extremely good CBH is not the same as asking someone out. Especially since my wife taught me how to cook it.

Probie · « **Reply #16 on:** March 26, 2009, 12:11:29 PM »

I jest, I jest.

ivan · « **Reply #17 on:** March 26, 2009, 12:18:14 PM »

I know. So do I. I don't really think your world of hamburgers and kebobs is grey and pitiable.

Jamie, by the way, has the chops. Besides being all cute and stuff. I expect him to achieve peerdom. He deserves it.

Probie · « **Reply #18 on:** March 26, 2009, 12:33:34 PM »

Everything he cooks looks so tastey. I also like hugh fearnley whittingstall but he's a bit of a ponce. I would love to grow my own food.

ivan · « **Reply #19 on:** March 26, 2009, 01:07:15 PM »

Hugh doesn't just grow it. Ponce or not, he can bring down a beast without flinching.

You're showing remarkably good judgement. And since one can't mention Fernley-Whittingstal without at least thinking of Fergus Henderson, I will shamelessly remark that almost a decade ago, I had one evening to spend in London, and I spent it, along with a substantial number of quids, at St. John. Bone Marrow Salad, hot diggetty dog!

But back to Jamie: his food and cooking philosophy echoes that of my wife, who developed and honed it and her skills throughout the many years I've known her. Jamie is giving voice to concepts and attitudes that previously I had encountered only around my own dinner table. I feel like I've been married to Jamie for years, except for the manly bits.

Probie · « **Reply #20 on:** March 26, 2009, 02:33:32 PM »

I cant give this conversation the full attention it deserves as am cooking. But i have a huge interest in it and will come back to it at such a time when there is not a curry on the hob!

xolik · « **Reply #21 on:** March 27, 2009, 12:45:58 AM »

I can boil up a mean cup o'noodles.

Top that, hotshots.

Probie · « **Reply #22 on:** March 27, 2009, 08:23:20 AM »

Yeah so, The muffins where a bust! Stupid flour! But I love Jamie's haphazard style. I would say I have a similar way of working, I don't tend to stick to the rules very precisely and measurements are not really my thing (hence the muffin disaster) but I love food and I can turn over a good dish.

I started reading one of his books not so long ago and a vaguely remember him saying something a long the line of:

There are a few ingredients that should be in every persons home and there are a few rules that you should stick to.

But obviously with more panache, I think he cooks meat so well and he like Hugh has a real appreciation for vegetables!

I just need to get better at this baking stuff, second thing I have tried to make with little success.

P.S The "muffins" where nice, I just don't think they had much in common with a muffin. It was more like a fairy cake with chocolate at the bottom

Wunderkind · « **Reply #23 on:** March 27, 2009, 09:50:31 AM »

Anything is good with chocolate at the bottom.

Probie · « **Reply #24 on:** March 27, 2009, 09:55:16 AM »

They were pretty tasty, but I wont be hanging up my heals for an apron just yet. One day i will be a domestic goddess, until then I'll just have to live with goddess rofl.

I was going to make blueberry and then the blueberry's where more expensive than the chocolate which almost brought all cognition to a halt. By brain blue screened, so i got chocolate instead.

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Author Topic: Muffins (Read 5541 times)