Topic: Things that make you go hmmm (Read 4150 times)

Unleashed · « **on:** April 24, 2003, 10:32:33 AM »

Is it good if a vacuum really sucks?

Why is the third hand on the watch called the second hand?

If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

If Webster wrote the first dictionary, where did he find the words?

Why do "fat chance" and "slim chance" mean the same thing?

Why do 'tug' boats push their barges?

Why do we sing "Take me out to the ball game" when we are already
there?

If work is so terrific, why do they have to pay you to do it?

Why are there floating devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why do they sterilize the needle used for a lethal injection?

If nothing ever sticks to Teflon, how do they make Teflon STICK to the pan?

If you were to drive your car at the speed of light, what would happen if you turned on your lights?

You know that indestructible black box on airplanes... WHY can't they make the whole plane of the same substance?

If CON is the opposite of PRO, is CONGRESS the opposite of PROGRESS?

Demosthenes · « **Reply #1 on:** April 24, 2003, 10:44:31 AM »

Why do men have nipples?

Why do "open 24 hours a day" stores have locks on their doors?

Quote

If you were to drive your car at the speed of light, what would happen if you turned on your lights?

I can actually field that one. Nothing out of the ordinary would happen. The speed of light, "c", is a constant and is relative to the observer and/or the source.

The big question is, if you accelerate matter to the speed of light, what would happen to that matter?

Answer: Invalid question. Matter cannot reach the speed of light. Only energy can.

MadDogged312 · « **Reply #2 on:** April 24, 2003, 10:47:55 AM »

In CONGRESS.... con is not a prefix and, therefore, is not the opposite of progress (pro is a prefix in gress, like digress).

Dark Shade · « **Reply #3 on:** April 24, 2003, 11:01:24 AM »

I got a few more for ya...

If canola oil comes from canola, and olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?

Who was the first person to say "Hey, I'm gonna squish these little things under my cow and drink whatever comes out. And see that chicken over there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's ass."

Can you get arrested for running into a fire hall yelling "Movie! Movie!".

If you shoot a mime with a silencer, will anyone care?

Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why do we keep singing about it?

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

Why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?

Why do we point to our wrist when asking what time is it, but not to our crotch when we want to go to the bathroom?

Here's a sexist one for ya: If a man speaks, and there's no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?

That's all I can think of for now. I'll be back with more...

snyperx · « **Reply #4 on:** April 24, 2003, 12:05:54 PM »

What came first, the chicken or the egg?

That one actually has an answer, I argued with a teacher for an hour over it, but I won.

HeavyJay · « **Reply #5 on:** April 24, 2003, 03:05:11 PM »

If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

Adonis · « **Reply #6 on:** April 24, 2003, 06:01:44 PM »

What is the use of an eject button on a remote control?

If women ran the pentagon, would missles and submarines be shaped differently?

If bread always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet; what would happen if you strapped buttered bread to the back of a cat?

(Note: Actually did this)

Demosthenes · « **Reply #7 on:** April 24, 2003, 07:42:20 PM »

Quote from: Adonis

If bread always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet; what would happen if you strapped buttered bread to the back of a cat?

Perpetual motion!!!!

I'm sorry... I can't advocate violating the laws of thermodynamics!!!!

Dark Shade · « **Reply #8 on:** April 24, 2003, 08:20:07 PM »

Quote from: snyperx

What came first, the chicken or the egg?

That one actually has an answer, I argued with a teacher for an hour over it, but I won.

And the answer is...?

HeavyJay · « **Reply #9 on:** April 24, 2003, 08:31:41 PM »

Yes, little help with that one?

Dark Shade · « **Reply #10 on:** April 24, 2003, 08:39:05 PM »

Apparently we're both right behind each other, posting as soon as the other does...yet we're not even PM'ing each other...

Oughta try that sometime, eh?

hob goblin · « **Reply #11 on:** April 24, 2003, 10:49:37 PM »

Quote from: Dark Shade

And the answer is...?

The egg, because what layed the egg was not a chicken, but a close relative, the two zygotes formed the gamete and there was genetic mutation which caused the offspring to form as a chicken.

Binoboy · « **Reply #12 on:** April 25, 2003, 09:24:27 AM »

Whyju tie buttered bread to a cat??? Was the experiment THAT important!!!!

snyperx · « **Reply #13 on:** April 25, 2003, 12:07:57 PM »

Quote from: hob goblin

Quote from: Dark Shade

And the answer is...?

The egg, because what layed the egg was not a chicken, but a close relative, the two zygotes formed the gamete and there was genetic mutation which caused the offspring to form as a chicken.

Meh, I was thinking something like "Gee, dinosaurs laid eggs..."

hob goblin · « **Reply #14 on:** April 25, 2003, 01:02:14 PM »

Well, that would work too.

HeavyJay · « **Reply #15 on:** April 25, 2003, 07:58:12 PM »

I like the cow's dangly bits question. Strikes me as amusing.

Adonis · « **Reply #16 on:** April 26, 2003, 06:59:38 PM »

Quote

I like the cow's dangly bits question. Strikes me as amusing.

Saw it once in a Calvin and Hobbes panel...have it up in my locker along with a couple of "Bloom County" hacker ones. You guys remember that cartoon? Oliver Wendell Jones was teh most l337 h4xX0r out there...

Quote

Whyju tie buttered bread to a cat??? Was the experiment THAT important!!!!

It was boring where I lived...didn't have a double T1 there

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